


the theory of relativity.

by AlwaysInSonder



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, Kidfic, Mutual Pining, One-sided Jidge/Pidjamas, Post S7, S8 Fix It Fic, These two dorks just keep running in circles around each other, Time Travel, plance, slow-burn(ish)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-08-02 07:40:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 31,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16300880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysInSonder/pseuds/AlwaysInSonder
Summary: "Well...what's the Garrison protocol for a lost child?""I don't know... stick them in a flight simulator and recruit them if they're good?"





	1. Chapter 1

_Hey Princess, we need to talk. x_

Lance stared at the words on his phone and gulped as the second tick on the box glowed indicating that she’d read his message.

After a few moments, her reply came.

_Sure, this afternoon?_

He bit his lip and typed an affirmative in reply. As soon as he hit send, he threw his phone and groaned. He didn’t know the right way of doing this, let alone whether what he was about to do was right at all. But the deed had to be done and dragging it on was only going to make matters worse.

Things with Allura had started off as a dream. He had the prettiest girl around on his arm and lived out his fantasy of kissing a princess.

But things got old; quickly at that too.

Allura was the first to be weary with him. Since discovering the mystery Altean in the Komar, she'd been distracted and moody. Not that Lance would ever hold it against her; he had enough tact to know the incredible amount of stress she was under. Their relationship increasingly felt like a burden - and he knew more so for Allura than him - and Lance didn’t want her to feel like she was obligated to be by his side. It didn't help either that their morning had started off with a petty argument over breakfast. It also didn't help that those 'petty arguments' were increasing in frequency.

He glumly soaked in the sunlight as he leaned back against his elbows. He munched on a baggie of peanut butter cookies – a batch he’d made a few days ago when Pidge had promised to play video games with him but had blown him off in favour of a date with James Griffin.

Truthfully, Pidge hadn’t wanted to go. She’d given the boy a soft maybe and it had been he who persuaded her to go.

He kind of regretted it.

He completely regretted it.

"Papa?"

Lance blinked down – way down, to see a little girl before him. She looked to be about two or three; perhaps younger with how short she was in height.

"Oh, hey there little guy. Looking for your dad?"

The girl's brows creased, and her lips twisted to a pout. Lance bent down to her height and raised his hands up in surrender.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Don’t cry, I promise we'll find him."

He offered his hand out to her and her little fingers clasped around his own. He led the girl towards the Garrison. Her little shoes made the soft squeaky sounds typical of toddler's shoes.

He glanced down at the girl, wondering if she was one of the officer's children. He knew of a small day-care centre for the children of Garrison staff, but he could not quite place who she might belong to. Dark curls escaped the faded blue beanie on her head in little wisps across her forehead. She seemed strangely familiar to him. Light freckles dusted the bridge of her little nose and her eyes were rounded and big. They were the colour of warm honey - light brown with flecks of gold weaved between. The thought stilled his heart as an image of another girl's eyes came to mind immediately.

He shook his head to be rid of the thought and looked out to the sprawling campus of the Galaxy Garrison. He'd be hard pressed to know where to find help. He considered bringing her to the small school room where the children of high-ranking officials went to classes but didn't think she'd be old enough.

"The day-care it is then."

The little girl seemed oddly calm for her age - fully content in holding the hand – or at least, the fingertips -  of a stranger and toddling after him on her tippy-toes. He noted her dark green hoodie and what looked like mermaid prints on her leggings.

"What's your name sweetheart?"

"Mah-zia."

She mumbled shyly. Lance felt goosebumps run up his arms. A child that closely resembled a girl he knew too well _and_ had his mother's name? He had to be in the Twilight Zone.

" _Marzia_. That's a pretty name. I'm Lance."

The girl frowned again and stopped in her tracks.

"No, Papa!"

Even the manner in which she pouted, and the way her little nose scrunched up adorably reminded him of _her_ face when she was annoyed with him. Her voice had even sounded insistent - almost as though she was confident of the fact that the young man before her had to be her father.

"Okay, okay. I'll be your Papa for like, five minutes. But I'm sure your actual Papa is worried sick about you. I know I would be if my daughter went missing- oh!" Marzia squealed and tugged at his hand. He followed her gaze.

In the distance, he spotted Nyma and Beezer walking out from one of the labs.

Marzia took off, her little shoes squeaking louder than her squeals as she made for Beezer. The robot looked a little panicked at first at the prospect of being tackled by a tiny human child, but eventually gave in to its fate and allowed the small girl to clamber over it.

"Hey - be careful!" Lance breathed heavily, as soon as he caught up with her. Nyma looked over to him bemusedly.

"I wasn't aware you had a child."

"I don't, but it sure feels like it."

"She's not yours?" her head tilted in curiosity. Her dark eyes looked over the child once more and a thought crossed her eyes, but it looked as though she decided to keep it to herself.

* * *

 

After Lance coaxed the little girl off the robot with the lone peanut butter cookie he had in his pocket, they eventually reached the small day-care centre situated just on the outskirts of the compound. Lance looked through the throng of small children as they played. He frowned as he noted their uniforms, glancing down again to see that the little girl wasn't similarly dressed in the navy and white sailor uniforms the other children ran around in.

"Excuse me?"

A tired looking young man looked over to him while trying to separate two screaming children from clawing each other's eyes out; it was safe to assume that he was one of the caretakers.

"Yes?"

"Uh...I think this little one here might have run off from the group. I just thought I'd make sure she was returned safely."

The young man looked over to the little girl and raised a brow.

"Sorry, don't think she's one of ours."

Lance frowned and glanced down to the little girl. She, again, looked far too calm. Her grip on his fingers tightened as she looked about the grounds, watching the children play.

He sighed and looked over to the man.

"Is there another day-care here? Maybe one for younger kids like her?"

"Sorry man, I think we're the only one for miles. Might be one in Plaht City."

Lance seriously doubted the child could have walked all the way out here on her own. Children weren't allowed on the Garrison compound without an adult supervising them at all times. Who else could she have belonged to? He sighed and bent down so he was on eye level with her. "Okay, sweetheart. This is getting serious. Can you tell me anything about your parents? Who was with you?"

The girl stared up at him and pointed straight at him. He closed his eyes and bent his head in defeat.

"Your dad's probably freaking out. I need to make sure you're returned to him."

A crease formed between his brows as he stood up determinedly.

"That's it. I'm not ending this day without finding your dad!"

He hoisted the child up on his shoulders and smiled at her small cry of joy; only to wince as her tiny hands tugged at his dark hair. But for some reason, he didn't mind and couldn't find it in him to be annoyed with her.

* * *

 

For someone who was comfortable with children, Lance felt like he was even more of a natural with Marzia. There was something about her that he could not quite place. He was sure it mostly had to do with how calm she was around him. He would have thought a child her age would be too frightened with no one familiar about and in a place that was very decidedly not child-friendly. But she seemed unfazed for the most part and more curious than anything.

He noted how her eyes lit up as they passed by windows, looking out to see the large spaceships being worked on. How she waved at the AI robots, how she easily rested her cheek on the top of his head and sighed softly. It gave him this warm feeling in his heart and he briefly wondered if he'd ever be a father himself; he'd always thought he'd have a bunch of boys but a little girl was quickly winning him over.

"I'd be very mad if I was your father, Marzia. You're way too trusting."

He'd intended for his tone to be firm, but he chuckled as he reached up to make sure that her little form was steady on his shoulders. Lance’s heart melted as he heard her yawn softly.

"Looks like it's someone's nap time."

"Lance!"

He turned to the voice and smiled as Hunk walked into view. His thick brows lifted at the sight of the sleepy little girl on his shoulders, but Lance saw how his eyes visibly softened.

"Aww, it looks like someone shrunk Pidge!"

His hands clasped before him as he fawned over the little girl. Her eyes sleepily blinked at the taller man before they brightened.

"Unc-y Hunk!"

Hunk positively melted while Lance's heart stopped. He never mentioned Hunk's name. How did she know?

"Hunk, please tell me you know her."

"Hm? I don't. Why would I?"

"Then how does she know _your_ name?"

Hunk stilled for a moment and turned his gaze to him slowly.

"I thought... _you_ told her my name. Isn't she a relative of yours?"

"I didn't....and she's not."

* * *

 

At Hunk’s recommendation, Lance decided to bring the girl back to the base where they could make an announcement. The staff there had given them a room to wait in. As the little girl snuggled on the couch, the two young men frowned over her. None of the staff recognised her and it was something of a worry as every single civilian was accounted for before being allowed entry into the compound. It was basically impossible for someone to sneak a child in.

"So, what you're telling me is you kidnapped this little kid."

"I didn't _kidnap_ her. She found me, and I've been trying to get her back to her dad!"

"Why her dad specifically?"

"She's been calling me Papa the whole day."

Hunk paused, and his jaw dropped with a thought. Lance raised an eyebrow in his direction.

"What if...what if this _is_ your kid?"

"That literally makes no sense Hunk. I _just_ met her."

"Does it though? Think about it, kids know their parents."

"Are you suggesting that I left behind a love child on Earth?"

Hunk shrugged and quipped nonchalantly, "I don't know what you get up to at night."

" _Hunk!_ " he dropped his tone as soon as Marzia shifted a little in her sleep. Her brows creased to a frown, but they smoothed over as she snuggled underneath the blankets further. Her hood had fallen off her head to reveal a shock of dark curls.

"It's scary how much she looks like Pidge. Maybe they're working on a quintessence shrink ray or something and she got hit by it?"

"I didn't think it was possible to make Pidge _smaller_ " he retorted. But the thought had nagged him since he first met her. She looked _way_ too much like Pidge. As far as he knew, Pidge only had Matt as a sibling and with his alien girlfriend, he highly doubted she could be her niece. Forget _daughter_.

"What are we going to do with her? I don't want to get charged with being an accomplice to a child kidnapper."

"Good grief Hunk! I brought her to the day-care here and they said they had no clue who she was. They couldn't take her in without knowing who she belonged to."

"Well...what's the Garrison protocol for a lost child?"

"I don't know... stick them in a flight simulator and recruit them if they're good?" 

* * *

 

Hunk eventually left citing that he had a date with Shay and promised to call him later that night. Lance had briefly considered confiding with his best friend about Allura but seeing the excited gleam in his eyes at the prospect of meeting his girlfriend told him that it could wait. If anyone deserved happiness, it was Hunk.

The speakers crackled, and Lance's head lifted as the announcement filtered through.

" _We have found a small girl, approximately two years old wearing a green jacket. Will her parent or guardian please come to Central Control? Thank you."_

It was not an announcement that he ever though he’d hear from the speakers of a military base. But as he watched the little girl stir away, her eyes focusing on him with a sleepy smile, he figured there was a first time for everything.

"Wow."

Lance's head snapped to the door as the speaker entered. Well, their shrink ray theory flew out the window. It'd been a while since he had seen her, and he rationalised that was the reason his heart rate rose.

"I thought Hunk was kidding, but damn."

Pidge’s head tilted as she scrutinized the small child's face. There was something of a gentle look in her eyes as she bent forward to brush the girl's bangs off her cheek.

"She's sweet," she whispered as she settled down on the couch next to Lance. He felt himself gulp as he tore away his gaze from her and down to the soundly asleep child between them.

Pidge's hair had grown out since returning to Earth and she kept it up in a neat ponytail with her bangs framing her amber eyes. Instead of her usual green shirt, she wore the Garrison’s uniform like he was and a lab coat. She'd been whisked away by the research and development team as soon as they'd all recovered from the Robeast attack, but Pidge looked like she enjoyed the work.

Enjoyed it enough not to miss him the way he did her.

"Haven't seen you in a while," he mumbled, reaching forward to pull the blanket higher to the girl's shoulders. He felt Pidge still before she sighed and relaxed back onto the sofa.

"Yeah...got caught up with the projects here."

"They stole our resident tech expert," he quipped, now feeling a little guilty for pointing out her absence, but she smiled. Besides, it wasn't as though the others were as present.

Even though Allura and he had begun to see each other, things weren't going the way he had hoped. She was a little distant and far too distracted. Not that he blamed Allura. Since discovering the Altean in the Robeast, all her energy went into the mystery woman. She spent most of her time by her bedside, anxiously awaiting her awaking. He felt like a bad boyfriend if he tried to spend more time with her.

It didn't help that his presence sometimes irritated her - especially when he tried to cheer her up. It was why he had been out brooding on the roof, to give her "space".

"How are things with you?" her voice was carefully soft, and she glanced over to Marzia, making sure she didn't wake.

Lance shrugged. "Can't complain. The MFEs and I been spending a little more time together and I got to test-fly some of the newer crafts. Fifteen-year-old me would kill to be in my place. James mentions you at least once a day. He’s clearly _smitten_."

Pidge’s cheeks tinted pink, but she waved her hand dismissively.

"But...you're _not_ happy?" she prodded, her eyes trained on him. He returned her gaze, and once again, he was struck; light brown with the soft gold flecks. "Lance...are you okay? You look a little pale."

He shook his head and blinked her way. "I'm alright. Just a little tired."

Her brow lifted, and her lips parted with a ready riposte, but she thought better of it and sunk back into her seat. A small part of him wished she'd call him out for lying to her.

"Pidge...we're okay, aren't we?"

"Why wouldn’t we be?"

Lance bit back a retort and turned to her with a frown.

"You haven't returned any of my calls."

He watched her gulp as she shakily stood up from her seat.

"Like I told you, I've been _busy_."

The hushed, annoyed tone in Pidge's voice - entirely too defensive, he had to note - stirred Marzia. But Pidge had stormed off before she could notice.

"Mama...?" 

* * *

 

Katie glumly took her seat at her lab and huffed in frustration. There was something about Lance that put her in an odd mood. Never mind if he was just being his usual goofy self or simply just minding his own business, she was always left feeling a little hot under the collar and just... _frustrated_.

She powered her laptop and resumed the programming she was working on before Hunk's text message to her. It made her pause and consider; did she really seek Lance out in genuine curiosity about the child that looked like her? Or was it something else entirely?

She shook her head to rid her mind of intrusive thoughts and returned to her work. As hard as she tried, she found her mind wandering - briefly thinking of the blue eyes that used to look down at her proudly but now looked at her with a certain wariness that wounded her in such a way that she could feel _physical_ pain in her chest.

"Working hard as usual, sweetheart?"

Her head lifted, and a small smile immediately found its way to her lips for the guest.

"Hey Mom. Just updating some of the Garrison's infrastructure." Her mother bent by her desk, looking over her daughter's shoulder to inspect her work. A warmth bloomed in her heart as her mother praised her tight, concise code and she received a soft, affirming kiss to her cheek for double modulating. Her mother had been the one to teach Katie coding at the tender age of four; she'd learnt from the best.

"Just don't tell your father," she said with a wink. Colleen set a bag on her table, no doubt containing a packed dinner, utensils and a small packet of peanut butter cookies for snacks. She looked apologetically up at her mother, who just brushed back a lock of her hair tenderly with a knowing look in her eyes. "I wish you’d come home for dinner, but I'm just glad you're _here_ at all." 

The pain Katie had desperately attempted to shove away re-emerged without her control and her eyes averted before her mother could notice the change in them.

Her mother knew it from her silence.

"Anything you want to talk about, dear?"

"I... I’m just...tired."

"Oh?"

Her mother pulled up a chair next to her and looked at her intently. It was not every day she opened up to her mother, especially since returning, but she was always infinitely patient with her and the thought of that alone made Katie's eyes tear up.

"Oh, Katie."

She let out a sob as warm, familiar arms wrapped themselves around her small form. Her mother murmured comforting noises and gently rocked her in her arms; just as she used to when she was a child. She should feel embarrassed, but right at that instant, she just wanted to be held.

As soon as she'd cried her fill, Katie sighed from the relief it gave her. There was a lingering ache in her chest, but she felt a whole lot lighter. She sniffled and pulled away from her mother, who offered her a napkin to blow her nose on. "It's alright to take a break occasionally, honey."

"No, I need the work. It helps keep my mind busy," she mumbled as she blew her nose.

Her mother nodded in understanding and gently brushed her hair in a way only mothers knew how, that released the tension she felt in her shoulders. She felt a little silly at the moment for crying, but she guessed it was the consequence of bottling it all up the way she did so instinctively - guarding her heart with all her might and hesitating to reach out to people.

"Is it about Lance?" Her voice was carefully soft. Katie's jaw dropped as she stared at her mother in bewilderment.

"H-How?!"

Her mother gave her a small, wiry smile. "What kind of mother would I be if I didn't know my own daughter?" But with a light shrug, she added, "I might have also read your diary. "

" _Mother_!"

Colleen chuckled at Katie’s horrified face and raised her hands in surrender. "I'm sorry dear. I just couldn't help myself. I promise I won't do it again if _you_ promise to come to your old mother for these sorts of things."

A hand rested tenderly on her cheek, "I need to get-to-know my new, grown-up daughter."

* * *

 

Another hour passed, and Lance found himself antsy, but mostly worried. What sort of parent leaves their child around and _doesn’t_ go into a frenzied panic? He'd lost his niece for five minutes at the grocery store once and had gone nearly hysterical only to realize she'd gone off to the bathroom on her own for a couple of minutes when he was flirting with the cashier.

"Marzia, your papa is a crazy man," he mumbled, as he watched the little girl run about the room with the small space shuttle figurines Veronica had given her earlier. His sister had been amused at the sight of the girl, noting how much the toddler’s dark, curly locks resembled his when he was a small child.

His eyelids began to droop but he slapped himself to keep awake. He couldn't afford to fall asleep when there was a vulnerable child on the loose in a military base. But the lack of sleep from last night and the exhaustion of his earlier argument with Allura was catching up with him.

"Just five minutes," he grumbled to himself, as he succumbed to the seductive pull of sleep and sank lower down the couch.

"Papa?"

Marzia stopped running and turned to the slumped figure of the young man in confusion.

"Finally," a figure mumbled as it emerged from the shadows. A cloaked man, built and not much taller than Lance, knelt as Marzia gasped and immediately ran as fast as her little legs could take her. She threw herself into the man's waiting arms. He chuckled softly as the little girl wrapped her arms around his neck and gave a soft squeal. The deep baritone of his voice made Lance stir from sleep.

"I'm sorry _mija_. I should've known better than to let you loose in mama's lab." He pulled the little girl up and perched her on his arm. Lance frowned through his sleep-heavy eyes as the man turned away from him.

"Who are you?" he mumbled, as he pulled himself upright and rubbed his eyes.

"I'm Marzia's father. Thank you for taking good care of her." His head bent to press a doting kiss to the top of her dark brown curls. Without turning around, the man thanked him once more and swiftly left the room. A flash of bright blue light filled the room that woke Lance enough to rush out after them, only to find a completely empty hallway.

"Lance. There you are."

He turned to find Allura standing behind him. He felt his heart still, but not in the way it used to. He didn't even feel the usual rush of giddiness of having such a beautiful woman even throw a _glance_ his way.

"Hey, Allura." He greeted her with a kiss to her cheek. She managed a weak smile for him and took his hand.

"You mentioned we needed to talk?"

Somehow, he knew what was in store for them and from the tired look in her eyes, it seemed like she did too. 

* * *

* * *

 

James was holding her hand again. In public.

Katie told herself that it really shouldn’t be that big of a deal to her, but she did not like the looks they were receiving. Most were surprised and others were more ambiguous. As someone who had once experienced the nastier end of comments from strangers, she was not enjoying this one bit.

"Hey, you alright?"

James squeezed her hand in what she supposed was a reassuring fashion. Katie offered a weak smile up at him and reluctantly tilted her head as he bent to kiss the top of her head. At the very least, James had the decency to show public affection in the dark corners of the corridors rather than in full view of her colleagues in the labs.

Oh, that was an excellent exit strategy.

"Hey um, I forgot about a meeting I was supposed to be in. I think it's starting in a few minutes."

Just as she slipped her fingers away from him, his arm came around her shoulders.

"Again? Well, that's a shame. I was hoping to introduce you to the rest of my team. Y'know, as Katie Holt. Not the Green Paladin of Voltron."

She blanched at the thought - not the prospect of meeting new people, interestingly enough - but the fact that someone she knew was likely to be there. She'd managed to worm her way out of going to the pilots' hangar for a good few weeks and even opted for projects that had little to do with space ships just so she could not _accidentally_ run into him. Or James, for the matter.

"I'm really sorry James, we're still on for our date tonight, aren't we?"

James nodded, but his arm was still firm around her as he made the detour. Her heart sunk to her belly; he was walking her to her lab. He was going to see through her lies.

"Of course, I'll pick you up at 7."

Her mind raced as she tried to come up with one more suitable excuse; a lie to cover up her former one. She didn't know how she managed to cope this long.

But it seemed like she didn't have to, for James' interest was piqued by a small figure sitting patiently on her chair.

"...Is that a family member of yours?" he asked, as he looked through the glass window and into the lab. The girl looked eerily like the one that Lance had found about a month ago. Short, dark-haired and brown eyed. Only this time, the girl looked to be a lot older. Perhaps four or five. She seemed content and at peace, blissfully unaware that she was illegally in a Level Five military facility with access restricted to only maybe ten people in total. She was quietly doodling on a small tablet on her lap - the model unrecognizable to Katie. The girl turned to her immediately as soon as Katie passed the biometrics lock on the door.

“Hey there little one.”

Katie softened her voice, suddenly feeling out of her element. As the large eyes - ones that were too like hers for comfort - blinked up at her, Katie knelt so the little girl didn't have to look so far up. It was not every day that Katie was taller than someone else; but also, it didn't help that she was feeling a little weak-kneed either. The child smiled wide and raised her arms. James came up behind her and rested a hand on her shoulder. He tilted his head towards the girl.

"She wants you to carry her." There was a hint of amusement in his voice. Katie paled and awkwardly placed her hands underneath her raised arms. She lifted the child, and with James' assistance, successfully balanced the child on her hip.

"I missed you, Mama," the girl mumbled against her coat. James sputtered behind her and Katie felt her cheeks warm in morbid embarrassment.

"Ah...where's your mama, honey?" She reasoned the child was confused, likely clinging to the first female that looked remotely like her mother.

The child pouted and pointed right at her nose; her tiny finger nearly knocking off her glasses. Katie squeaked as she tried balancing the child on her hip and the glasses that threatened to slip down the slope of her nose. James came to her rescue and easily lifted the little girl onto his shoulders. At first, she'd looked apprehensive about being on the tall man's shoulders but enjoyed the new vantage point as any child would. James winced as the girl's small hands gripped his hair and Katie gently rested a hand behind her back.

"Come on, you have to tell us. Your mom is probably looking all over for you."

The girl pointed at her again and she sighed in exasperation. James chuckled and touched her hand. “I think you should go inform Central Control. People keep losing their kids here for some reason. You’d think an inter-galactic war would have made them warier of a facility filled with space ships.”

“You’re telling me.”

* * *

 

“Aw, they look like a happy family!”

Lance watched as Katie looked up at James as he spoke to her. He felt an ugly flare of jealousy in his chest and crossed his arms as the child, now in James’ arms, toyed with the badges on his uniform. Hunk nudged him, “Don’t you agree, Lance?”

“Yeah. A real happy family,” he grumbled, turning on his heel to walk away from the nauseatingly sweet scene through the window.

* * *

 

Katie returned to the room with a juice box and the relic that was Killbot that she’d managed to dig up from her lion. The fact that dust had settled over the well-loved and used device sent a pang through her chest but at least now, Katie had an excuse to bring it out.

But as soon as she entered the lab, she’d found only James, waiting patiently for her as he always did.

“I have to go now, Katie. Rizavi’s starting up a drill and she’ll have Kinkade taking my spot if I’m late.”

“Wait, where’s the little girl?”

“Her mother came for her.” He brushed a kiss to her forehead. “I think she mentioned something about disturbing time? I don’t know, she was in a rush, so I didn’t want to hassle her.”

“Oh…okay.”

“Hey, the kid’s safe now. Don’t worry about her anymore.” He leaned forward and looked into her eyes. She flushed at the proximity, fully aware that he was hoping for a kiss. Graciously enough, James pressed it to the tip of her nose.

“Seven, my little bird. Don’t forget again.”

* * *

 

“You come up here to rock out?”

Her heart stopped for several seconds as her headphones left the top of her head. She gulped and slowly turned to meet the blue eyes that haunted her daydreams. His voice wasn’t nearly as teasing as the first time he’d said those words to her. If anything, they were a tad melancholic. It squeezed her heart in ways she didn’t have the words to describe. 

“Lance…hey.”

It was the weakest her voice has ever been, but there was no denying that she was happy to see him. She shifted aside on the roof, making room for the long-legged paladin next to her. He dangled his legs over the edge of the building and sighed.

“Hey yourself. What are you doing up here again? Looking for alien chatter?”

She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear – a nervous habit that was quickly returning since her hair grew out. Katie gave him a side smile and returned her gaze over to the rocky plains that surrounded the Garrison. The sun was down but it was a while yet before the sun would set. Her colleagues had left early for the weekend and Katie had planned to work on a small side project over the weekend. She was just taking a breather up on the roof before her date that evening.

“What brings you up here?” she asked dimly. She folded her headphones and slipped them into the pocket of her lab coat. His eyes followed her fingers in a way that made her self-conscious.

“Just…wanted to clear my head.”

“Something the matter?”

“Allura and I broke up.”

“Oh.”

Her voice was soft, and she was glad the curiosity in her mind didn’t leech to her tone.

"Are you...doing alright?"

"I'll be fine. Allura will be too. I know this may sound hard to believe, but it was mutual thing."

He slumped himself next to her and rested a hand gently on her shoulder. Katie felt his fingers gently tug at her and she gave in, pulling herself closer to him to rest her head on his shoulder. Katie sighed softly and brought her eyes back to the scenery before them. The sun dipped down behind the tall, gleaming buildings of the new Plaht City in the distance; pink-orange hues flooded overhead as dusk quickly settled over the Garrison compound. Above her, Lance took in a deep breath before speaking.

"Do you ever feel like...you've missed something that has been right in front of you?"

Katie bit her lip in thought. "I can't imagine that would be a problem you would have, _Sharpshooter_."

She couldn't see him roll his eyes.

"I wasn't talking about it _literally_. I just think...you know what? Never mind."

She frowned and sat herself upright. Katie nudged him, giving him a look that told him that she was going to be there all night till he gave an explanation. Lance only sighed and ran a hand through his hair. She hadn't noticed till then, but he'd stop styling the locks with gel. His hair flopped over his forehead in a way that made him look more relaxed than the juvenile debonair he'd aimed for as a teenager.

He sighed again and turned his blue eyes down to look at her and she felt her heart skip several beats. His thumb brushed over the blush on her cheeks, "When the time is right, and I've cleared my head, I promise I will tell you." His voice was low and his gaze so intense, it sent strange sensations to her belly. She averted her eyes and nervously fidgeted on the spot. She had no idea what he meant, and it was driving her nuts.

"How are you with James?" He prodded her cheek gently, his expression infuriatingly unreadable.

She shrugged and adjusted her glasses. "He's...fine."

"Just _fine_? You have the most eligible, hotshot pilot on the compound courting you for an entire year and all you can say is that?"

"Wouldn't that be you?" she quipped, smirking as he sputtered. She’d turned her head just in time to see the flush on the tips of his ears.

“But really…I think he and I aren’t going to work out. I have a date with him tonight but, I think I might just tell him that I can’t be what he needs.”

“What do you think he needs?” He tilted his head, suddenly sitting up very straight. He aggressively pushed away the bubbling hope that was aching to spill over his heart.

Katie only shrugged. “I’m not sure, just _not_ me. I don’t feel like I can be myself around him. It’s not his fault or anything, I’m just…too closed off I guess. I’ve been…I’ve been too hung up on someone else.”

Lance leaned his head closer in interest from the corner of her eye and every instinct screamed at her to just _tell him_.

“I think I’m in love with him…but I’m too cowardly to tell him.”

He was quiet for a long while before his arm came around her again but this time he pulled her in for a hug. She kept her arms around herself but leaned her head to his shoulder.

"We're not very good at relationships, are we?"

"Nope."

* * *

 

“Who do you like more?”

“I don’t know.” Her mother raised her eyebrow at that and Katie flushed. “I mean it, Mom! I really don’t.”

“You and I _both_ know who you like better.” The older woman handed her the mug of her tea and curled up next to her on the pillows. It felt like she was five years old again and her mother read to her space-themed stories right before bed.

“You don’t have to tell me who it is, just tell me about this boy’s good points,” her mother took a careful sip of her tea and ran her fingertips over her daughter’s brow.

“He’s handsome.” Collen hummed in agreement at that.

_So was Lance._

“He likes me as I am,”

_Lance adored her as she was._

“He’s caring and protective of me; never lets me walk home alone at night,”

_As does Lance._

She shoved the intrusive voice in her head away and focused on James again.

“We…have a lot in common?”

Her mother didn’t look convinced at her tone, and she let it show.

“I think you need to give him another chance, sweetheart.”

Katie tilted her head, “James?”

Her mother looked genuinely confused but sighed resignedly. “I’m not going to tell you what to do with your life. If you feel like James is the one for you, then so be it.” She shifted so Katie could lean her head on her shoulder as she stroked her hair.

“I just hope you find someone that makes you happy and, well, feel adored.”

“Does Dad make you feel _adored_?” she asked as she lifted her head, her features and tone completely deadpan. If her mother considered her a workaholic, she didn’t know how she perceived her own husband.

“Of course, he does. You’re just not around for it.” She winked and laughed indulgently at the mortified expression on her daughter’s face.

“So, when are you bringing James home for dinner?”

* * *

_Pidge was in love with someone._

It had kept him up all week. He’d even gone to the trouble of making a list of all things; crossing out and adding back potential contenders.

Who on Earth – oh goodness, he hadn’t even considered if the bloke was even _human_ – was Pidge Holt in love with?

It drove him insane.

There weren’t a lot of people Katie and he mutually knew. Besides the individuals they’d met together on Voltron, he hadn’t the slightest clue who pre-Kerberos Katie Holt was.

“Maybe you should just ask her?” Hunk had said in exasperation one day. The usually ever-patient boy of their team was at his wits end watching his friend tear his hair out over the constant speculation.

“I can’t just _ask_ her! Wait, what are you- HUNK!”

Hunk was already on the phone, speed-dialling his other best friend. The taller boy swatted away his friend’s hands as he tried to pry the phone away from his fingers.

“ _Hey Hunk!_ ”

He ignored the stab in his heart. She’d picked up his call within three rings.

“Hey Pidge, just wanted to check up on ya.”

It was almost like listening to another person - the Pidge he knew and missed. She was cheerful, lively and most of all, _happy_ to hear from Hunk.

He paused and stared at his friend.

 _Hunk?_ She was in love with Hunk?!

But something told him that could not be true. As Hunk carried an effortless, casual conversation with their team mate, Lance impatiently pressed his ear on the other end of Hunk’s phone until he put her on loudspeaker.

“So Pidge…how’s it going on the dating end?”

Her giggles mortified him. But the sinking feeling in his belly made him instinctively realize why. He just needed to hear her say it for herself – maybe he was hoping he was wrong – and then, he could finally move on. He could almost _hear_ her shift uncomfortably in her seat when she forced herself to answer.

“ _I…I decided to give James another chance._ ”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to cgf-kat for beta-ing this chapter! Please do tell me your thoughts about the story so far ^^


	2. Chapter 2

"How's the steak?"

"It's...good..." she managed to squeak. She waited for him to look away from her before carefully spitting into her napkin. Looking after Kaltenecker had made Katie swear off beef. She hadn’t thought it would bother her, but since biting into a burger upon her return to Earth – and promptly feeling her stomach turn as soon as the cooked meat touched her taste buds — she had decided it was something she couldn’t bring herself to do. It certainly wasn't something she had ever imagined herself to worry over, but Kaltenecker was practically a child to her.

The thought made heat rush to her cheeks. Did that make Lance the father of her “child”?

James looked up and she pretended to delicately dab her lips as she’d seen Allura do before. He popped a cut of his own steak between his lips and chewed slowly, looking at the mostly untouched plate before her and finally up to her eyes.

"I think...I _didn't_ think this through. You really love that cow, don't you?"

She hid her face with the napkin and groaned softly. James chuckled and reached over to touch her hand. “Katie, you could have just told me." He signaled for the waiter and picked up her plate. Politely, he requested for them to pack her steak, and to get her the chicken dish.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled as the waiter left with her barely-eaten steak.

James just gave her a soft smile. "It's fine."

He'd said it reassuringly, but the look in his eyes told her that it wasn't. Guilt weighed heavily in her chest.

"Would you rather we leave early?"

"Oh no! Please, you've been looking forward to bringing me here all week."

"Yeah, bringing _you_. I've been here plenty of times. Katie, please, be honest with me. I won't bite."

She bit her lip, but it was obvious that James already knew her answer. He immediately signaled for the waiter again.

"Cheque please."

* * *

 

Lance had to marvel at his own self-restraint. Every single time Pidge smiled up at James, every touch between the two, their shared glances and James' relentless gentlemanly ways all made him want to hurl himself into a wormhole and away from the sickening picture the two painted.

But Pidge looked genuinely happy, and that was way more important to him. As much as he wouldn't deny the dull ache in his chest - one that he had never felt with such an intensity before - he refused to be a brat. If she was happy, then he’d endeavor to be happy for her.

That was why he was at the grocer’s with Hunk and Romelle, helping shop for ingredients for the cake Hunk was making for Pidge's surprise birthday party.

The one that James was throwing.

No, he was not at all irritated that he hadn’t thought of it first. It’s completely normal for the _actual_ boyfriend to want to organize a party for his lady love. Plus, he was her best friend; even if they hadn’t really talked to each other in what felt like months, he wanted to be there for her for her special day. His fingers curled tightly around an orange he’d been inspecting at the thought of James giving her a birthday kiss.

“Lance, if you want orange juice, go to the drinks section. Put that poor citrus down. Romelle, for quiznack’s sake, please stop harassing the fish in the tank.”

“What are they called?”

“Barramundi.”

"And this is...?"

"A crab."

"What about those?"

"They're salmon. Romelle, honey, I promise I'll teach you the names of the entirety of the seafood section, but we _really_ need things for the cake. Fish ain't one of them."

"Wait, you mean to tell me you _eat_ these marvelous creatures?!"

Lance chuckled as Hunk face-palmed and dragged their Altean friend to the baking goods section.

"What kind of cake are you making bud?"

"James really liked that angel food cake made from the Relkisian eggs that I baked for the diplomats from Relkisia. Might try to add in chocolate or something to make it more human-friendly. Hey Lance, do you mind grabbing some berries? I think a compote would pair exquisitely."

"Sure thing."

He tucked his hands into his jacket pockets and sauntered away from the pair. Romelle had already launched into a new set of questions and had to be pried away from the bulk foods section before she could shove a spoonful of flour into her mouth.

"Do you not consume that?"

"Remind me never to take you grocery shopping again."

* * *

 

"Hey mister."

Lance looked down. His brows raised as his gaze settled on the small girl. Her dark curls were tamed into a side ponytail, and she was dressed in what looked to be a uniform, but he could not recognize the emblem embroidered on the pocket. That was the least of his worries, though.

She had _her_ eyes.

"Are you...lost?" he asked warily. He wondered if he was being pranked by Hunk. It was far too much of a coincidence that he kept running into Pidge doppelgangers. She looked much like the little girl from a few months ago but older.

It was then Lance noticed that she had an open jar of smooth peanut butter in her hands. She dipped her finger into it, dug out a huge chunk, and popped it in her mouth.

Lance shoved away the impulse to nag at her like he would with his niblings. He did not know this child and he wasn't about to get himself embroiled in another lost child case.

"Hey...did you pay for that?"

She shook her head and smiled cheekily up at him. Almost instantly, he felt the telltale signs of his heart wanting to give in to every single thing the little tyke before him got herself into. He'd be a sucker if he was a father for real. He sighed and looked about him.

"That is not good kiddo. You need to pay for things at the store before you eat them. Where are your parents?"

She blinked at him once, as though she was carefully thinking what to say, and shrugged before she spoke. "My daddy will pay, and they're at work. Auntie Mel said I can do whatever I want."

"And where is this Auntie Mel?" he grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. Her little ponytail whipped around as she searched the area, stopping when her eyes settled on the exasperated Hunk and Romelle in the distance, where it appeared that Romelle had discovered that watermelons were, in fact, not bowling balls.

The child tilted her head curiously. "I think that's her. I don't know. She looks different."

“Okay kid, I have no idea wha—”

A beeping sound interrupted him, and Lance realized it was from the girl's wristwatch. She gasped and threw the jar of peanut butter his way.

"I have to go! Mom is gonna kill me!"

"Hey! Wait!"

He tried running after her, but the girl disappeared underneath a rack of fresh produce. He stuck his head beneath the cover and winced as his eyes met with a blinding blue light. When his vision recovered, he wasn't surprised to see the girl gone without a trace.

“Lance, what the heck are you doing?”

Lance bumped his head as he stood up. He rubbed the sore spot glumly and looked over to his friends. Hunk had a firm arm around Romelle’s hips, restraining her before she wandered off and dipped her hands in the fresh seafood tanks.

“Nothing important, as usual,” he mumbled.

* * *

 

Katie never thought that she would ever have an issue with understanding a physics concept. But here she was, facing a stupendously enormous dilemma. There wasn't much in the way of her understanding Einstein's theory of special relativity - time was relative and dependent on how fast an object moved. It was why even when they were out in space for what felt like less than two years, four years had passed on Earth.

But she needed to go beyond human-derived physics for her current project. Shrinking the teleduv and making it portable was a lot harder than she anticipated. Travelling through wormholes meant that time shrunk and maybe even expanded in ways that were beyond her comprehension.

She sighed and leaned back against her table, looking over the massive glass board where she'd written out dozens upon dozens of calculations. She took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes. A quick glance at her phone showed that she had two hours before her date with James. She opened her texts and typed out a cancellation.

_Hey James, I might have to cancel. I got caught up with work again. I’m so sorry._

She paused as her finger hovered over the 'send' button. She breathed in heavily and sighed: a part of her knew that it wasn’t work that was holding her back from seeing him. There were only so many cancellations she could make before James would catch on in the worst possible way.

No. Tonight would be the night she'd tell him.

"Pidge?"

Her head snapped up and her brows rose at the figure hesitating by the door. She quickly slipped her phone into her coat pocket.

"Allura! Ah- come in..." she hastily cleared the piles of spare parts off a chair, making room for her to sit. She flushed as the Altean looked at the paraphernalia about her in wonder. If it weren't for the expensive equipment that flanked the spacious lab, the room could have easily been mistaken for a junkyard.

"Sorry about the mess...I never expect anyone here." Even James avoided her private lab; ever since a stray ship part smeared thick, unwashable lubricant on his usually-spotless uniform, he'd made sure to keep his distance from the mess.

"Oh Pidge. Never apologize for this, it's a lovely quirk to your genius." Allura smiled warmly at her as she elegantly seated herself on the cleared-out chair. "I hope I've not caught you at a bad time. I know I should have given you a call or something beforehand-"

"It's fine, Allura," she interjected, fiddling with the buttons of her coat. She wasn't exactly sure why Allura was in her office, but she guessed it had something to do with the Komar.

"Well..." Allura's eyes looked distant for a moment before determinedly focusing on her. "I was wondering if we could... _hang out_ , as Earthlings say."

Katie couldn't help the snort, but she clapped a hand over her mouth. Allura's brow rose and she shook her hand hastily. "Oh no! I just never expected to be referred to as an _Earthling_ by an alien. At least not un-ironically. But it's completely fine." She reached into the bag (again, left by her mother), dug out the packet of peanut butter cookies and offered it to the princess. "And I'd love that, Allura. I really would."

At her reassurance, Allura smiled, picked out one of the cookies and relaxed back in her seat. Katie watched as she inspected the snack before taking a delicate nibble. It was those sort of little details that made Katie feel uncultured and _very_ unladylike. No wonder Lance liked her. "Oh, this biscuit is delightful!"

"Right?" she quipped as she popped one whole in her mouth.

"I'd love to share these with Coran. He's always missed my mother's rymeberry biscuits." She chewed thoughtfully and smiled distantly. "The taste may be different, but the texture and shape certainly remind me of them."

"I'll make a batch just for him," Katie promised. "I could maybe add some cranberries or something. I don't know what rymeberries tastes like". She might not be trusted in the kitchen - Hunk and her mother had personally banned her from cooking without close supervision - but the one thing she _could_ make, with minimal injury, were peanut butter cookies.

"I'd love to make them with you!" Allura said with a sincere smile.

Katie’s eyebrows shot up, but she nodded. Discreetly, she reached into her pocket and hit 'send'.

* * *

 

"Is this all right?"

Katie looked over her shoulder and nodded. "Yup! It looks great!"

Allura visibly brightened as she shaped another bit of cookie dough and set it gently on the baking tray. "This is oddly enjoyable! I thought it would be quite laborious but it's actually therapeutic." Her bright blue eyes turned to her, her tone softening as she said, "I'd say present company has much to do with it as well."

Katie felt the tips of her ears burn with a blush, and she returned her focus to shaping the cookies between her palms. "I like hanging out with you too. It feels like forever since I've returned home while the sun's still up."

"Oh? You must be working really hard."

Katie just shrugged.

"But I hope it's not at the expense of your well-being, Pidge.” Her voice was gentle, but Katie couldn't help but bristle. It was fine if her mother, well, _mothered_ her. She didn't particularly enjoy it when others did.

"Forgive me if I overstepped. I only meant to point out how...closed off you seem. Lance was very concerned you see."

Her shoulders tensed, and it took Katie a moment to realize that she'd flattened the dough between her palms at the mention of his name. Even her heart had begun to race; when did she become this silly?

_One. Two. Breathe._

"I'm fine," she chirped, mentally wincing at the fake cheeriness of her tone. "I'm just occupied with research for the Garrison." The excuse was getting far too old.

She could sense Allura's uncertainty but the Altean gave in, and they resumed shaping cookies.

* * *

 

The waters of the lake reflected the dusk colours of the sky. Lance picked up a stone and smoothed his thumb over the edge. It was flat, and smooth – a good specimen for stone skipping. He angled his arm, as Pidge had taught him once, and threw the stone. It skipped twice before sinking into the calm waters.

The lake was a small haven he had found when he first moved to the Garrison. There wasn't a beach for miles and this was the closest he could get to a natural body of water. He had brought Allura here, before, and they'd shared their first kiss under the stars, but since then it had quickly became a place that he couldn’t think of fondly anymore.

_“I have a feeling you know why I brought you out here,” Lance began. He dusted off the seat next to him, waiting until Allura seated herself before continuing. “But I want to hear how you’re feeling first.”_

_Allura bit her lip and looked out onto the lake. Lance noted the dark circles under her eyes and reminded himself to check on whether she was sleeping on time._

_“It is a stressful time. Not just for me, I am aware. But the colony Altean…I never expected to see her there. Between her, dealing with Garrison politics and...Haggar, I just do not know what to make of the situation.”_

_Lance nodded in understanding, reaching for her hand. She squeezed it weakly and leaned her head against his shoulder._

_“You miss Pidge. Don’t you?”_

_He tensed, and Allura lifted her head to look him in the eye. The expression on her face told him that she wasn’t going to accept ‘No’ for an answer._

_“I…do,” he replied finally, feeling the strange turmoil in his chest quiet with the admission. “She’s just never around anymore. It feels like…she’s avoiding me. And I know for sure that it has everything to do with me. She finds time for Hunk and I think I even saw her eat lunch with Keith the other day. I can’t even go to her labs, it’s restricted access.”_

_“I cannot help but feel like I’m responsible for that,” Allura sighed._

_“What?! No! Allura—”_

_“Pidge…I’m certain she likes you,” she began, curling her fingers around his hand. “In a way that’s more than just friends, Lance,” she added slowly, seeing the confused look on his face. For several beats, he was quiet as he processed the information. His lips parted, then closed, and he blinked several times._

_“WHAT?!”_

_Allura winced and looked about her. A few heads turned their way, curious as to the sudden outburst from the boy. She gave an apologetic smile before returning her gaze to him._

_“No. No, there’s no way. Pidge is my best friend. There’s no way she would like me…in THAT way.”_

_“Well, if you say so,” Allura muttered, rolling her eyes. “But forget Pidge. I’ve seen the way_ you _look at her from afar. You text her everyday and wonder why she doesn’t return your calls. Even when we’re alone together, you talk about her. You miss her dearly Lance. Not in the way you miss the others. There’s something there that you’re not willing to acknowledge.” She paused and Lance looked off into the distance, processing her words before she continued. “I’d always thought it was sweet how close the two of you are. It would break my heart if I’m the reason-”_

_“Allura, the issue between Pidge and I is one hundred percent my fault. I’m pretty sure I did something stupid and pissed her off. Pidge likes you; she’s willing to spend time with you.”_

_Allura bit her lip at that, but shrugged. “That doesn’t negate that all this happened after you and I started dating, nor the fact that she occupies your thoughts far more than I am comfortable with...” Her voice trailed off as she shifted awkwardly in her seat._

_He didn’t know how to counter that – mostly because he couldn’t. It was true: Pidge_ did _occupy a great portion of his thoughts. A silence fell between them, not quite awkward; moreso, neither of them knew how to continue._

_“Whatever it is, I hope you two sort yourselves out. As for me, well…” She breathed in heavily and released his hand. “I’d be lying to you if I said Lotor hasn’t been haunting my dreams.”_

_Lance snapped out of his reverie immediately. The revelation should have stung his ego, but it didn’t. He only felt concern for Allura._

_“But that’s my burden to bear. I’m thankful for you, Lance.” She touched his cheek. “I’ve been feeling out of sorts on Earth…You’ve been an anchor to me. I will never not be grateful to you.”_

_His eyes softened, “I know Lotor’s a jerk, but he’s our burden. Voltron’s burden. You’re not alone, ‘lura”_

The kiss on the cheek she gave him that day noted the end of their short-lived relationship. The moment had given him something akin to a huge sigh of relief, but had also simultaneously added to the greater burden of the mystery of Pidge and his’ disappearing friendship.

Couples and Garrison staff and their families milled about further down the shore, near the clearing where picnics and barbeques were held. He’d even spotted a few aliens mingling with the humans. Even amid an inter-galactic war, people still craved a semblance of normalcy.

Much like the couple walking along the edge of the lake before him.

* * *

 

The lake water licked at her ankles. It was ominously dark, but the great expanse of the night sky reflected on the surface made it seem far less so. James' hand was warm, as was his jacket that rested heavily on her shoulders and brushed her thighs where the hem of her dress fell. His thumb ran over her knuckles and she felt goosebumps rise – someone once close to her heart used to do that to soothe her. James released her hand momentarily to fold his pants up higher. It surprised her; for someone that dressed so impeccably in well-tailored clothes, he didn't look too bothered about dirtying them. His dress shoes and her wedges were discarded on shore.

"James..." she began as he stood up and reached for her hand. His fingers were so wonderfully warm on her again that it distracted her from speaking. He smiled kindly down at her and she flushed as an arm wrapped around her waist.

She toyed distractedly with one of the buttons of his shirt; not realizing what she was doing until she heard his breath hitch above her. She flushed and pulled her hands away from his chest and placed them up on his shoulders.

“We’ll be up in space in a few weeks,” she started, worrying her bottom lip. James’ eyes lowered, following the motion.

“I’m excited…but nervous too, y’know. It’s not going to be like the simulations.”

Katie managed a smile. “I don’t think you can even comprehend.” She lifted her eyes, steeling herself to tell him what she’d been meaning to for weeks now.

But his head had dipped close to hers, disarming her. "I'm going to kiss you, okay?" he whispered, his lips brushing over her cheek. She didn’t know why, but she gave a meek nod and his lips finally met hers. Her mind screamed at her to pull away, but her body craved the addictive warmth that he offered. Just like _his_ , James' toned body _radiated_ heat. She melted in his arms and James pulled her in and deepened the kiss.

She shivered as his fingers slid down to rest against the gentle curve of her hip. Her lips parted for air and James trailed his kisses along her jawline and down to right below her earlobe - a spot where, she quickly learnt, she was very sensitive. She'd closed her eyes at some point, she couldn't remember when.

She enjoyed the kiss, there was no denying that. Her body hummed in warm pleasure and she was sure that if they were somewhere less open, things would have gotten steamy very quickly. But several things were undeniable; she'd imagined tanzanite blue eyes gazing down at her and second, her heart was perfectly calm.  She reasoned real life was just different and firmly locked away the nagging reminder of how a mere _smile_ from a certain someone was enough to invoke a stronger reaction in her.

James sensed her tensing and stilled his lips before they drifted further down her neck. They were in a relatively isolated part of the lake. A few people milled about further down along the shore, but it was impossible to make out the individual dark figures. "Are you alright?" he murmured, rubbing a thumb over her cheek, flushed with the cold and the proximity.

"Mmhm..." She rested her head against his chest. James was deathly quiet above her. She felt his fingers comb through her hair and she sighed contentedly at the feeling - shoving away the memory of when someone else would do it for her.

James sighed quietly. "I'll never measure up to him, will I?"

Katie's head shot up in surprise. But before she could reply, two teenaged boys pushed themselves between them.

" _Excuse me!_ "

" _Pardon me!_ "

A pair of shirts flew as the boys threw themselves into the lake. James, the unfaltering gentleman he was, shielded her with his body before the splashes could hit her.

* * *

 

Lance had seen enough. All he had wanted was for a tranquil night by the lake. He attempted to pull himself up, but the crushing feeling in his chest - one that knocked the wind from his lungs and clawed painfully up his throat - made it difficult to do so.

He shook his head. No, he was not going to be jealous. He was going to be happy. Happy that she'd found someone who loved her. Someone who immediately saw her as the wonderful young woman she was.

But then his stomach turned as James ran his fingers through her long hair and Katie leaned closer to his body after the kiss.

Mercifully, a pair of boys interrupted them, and now James was left soaked and annoyed. He indulged in a smile before finally pulling himself up and walking away.

* * *

  

"James...you don't have to-"

He shrugged as he deftly tied the green, satin ribbons of her wedges around her ankles. "I want to Katie."

The heavy guilt in her chest returned and she touched his cheek hesitantly.

"You're a _prince_ ," she managed. "I can't imagine how you aren't already snatched up by someone."

"Well, ask the girl who just broke my heart." He laughed good-naturedly at the stricken expression on her face and reached for her other ankle. He slipped the other wedge on as she rested a hand on his shoulder, letting him tie up the ribbons. “I’ll get over it,” he said, forcing a smile for her.

"I really do mean it. If I wasn't so...pathetically in love with someone way out of my reach...I know I'd fall head over heels-"

"I hope Lance knows what he's missing."

She froze at that. "Does _everyone_ at the Garrison know?!"

"No, but his name certainly brings out a reaction with you."

She rolled her eyes. As she stepped out of the lake with a soaked James, she turned back once more to see a cloaked figure drag both boys out of the water by the ears.

* * *

 

She might have been thinking about it for a while, but Katie hadn’t been prepared for breaking up with James to hurt.

She had always figured that if two people just weren't suited for each other, then there shouldn't be much pain in parting ways with someone that you don't love anymore. Or, as in her case: never even really loved to begin with. She'd be lying if she said she didn't feel relieved that they'd broken up, but a part of her selfishly wondered if she was throwing away a chance at experiencing love in her otherwise relatively solitary life.

But breaking up with James _did_ hurt in ways she did not anticipate. She took him for granted, that much she was aware of. Once he stopped coming by to pick her up for lunch, coming by in the evening to kiss her good night or even offering her a drive home when he stayed late, she realized how much effort he'd put into caring for her.

She cleared her throat and shoved the ball of tissues she'd been crying in deep into her lab pockets. Her phone buzzed with a text and her chest rose with the deep breath she took when she saw who it was from.

_I'm waiting for you in your lab, can we talk? x J_

* * *

 

"Oh guys! She's coming! Hide!" Hunk rushed to light the candles on the cake where it was hidden behind a pile of miscellaneous parts.

"This isn't going to work, she probably figured this out-"

" _Keith,_ for once in your life, can you stop being a killjoy?" Lance hissed under his breath, dragging him down to hide from the windows. James hushed them both as Pidge's light footsteps drew closer to the door. Lance could almost see her face - she looked weary - and he heard her sharp inhale, as though preparing to be jumped upon by a dozen people. The card reader beeped and as soon as the door slid open, the room jumped forward.

" _Happy Birthday!_ "

Pidge froze on the spot, her hand still raised and her card still in her hand. She blinked slowly - and Lance noticed then, how her eyes were a little red -, taking in the several people who'd crammed into her workspace. Her lips parted and then closed as she looked around some more.

"Quiznack...I didn't even realize it was my birthday." Laughter filled the space as James walked forward to give her a hug and drag her towards her parents. He felt a nasty flare of jealousy rise in his chest as her boyfriend stood next to her while she hugged her parents.

"James figured we couldn't get you to leave the lab, so we brought the celebrations to you!" Sam chuckled, tousling the top of his daughter's hair.

"I can't believe you were about to spend your twentieth _working_ , Katie," her mother said as she gripped her in a tight hug. "The day my baby becomes a young woman."

Pidge groaned and rolled her eyes "Mom...It's just like any other birthday."

Lance leaned back against the wall, watching as people sang her a birthday song and she blew out the candles and cut the cake. Out in space, they'd approximated their birthdays, but only celebrated them if they weren't tied up in a fight. He'd missed being able to do simple rituals like this. One by one, people took their turn to hug and wish the birthday girl.

His breath hitched as she looked about the room and her eyes landed on his. He forced himself to smile and mouthed a ‘Happy Birthday’. The smile she gave him in return was full of melancholy but she nodded her head and turned back to James who wanted to take a picture of her with her parents.

After one last, long look at her profile, he quietly slipped out the door.

* * *

 

There was a time Katie when would have cried at the thought of cutting her hair. A time when the sound of snips by her ear chopping away great chunks of hair would have made her sick to the stomach. But she wasn’t that little girl anymore, and hadn’t been since she was fourteen.

“How does this look?”

Katie inspected the side of her head with the hand mirror and ran her fingers through her hair. Air tickled at the back of her neck - a feeling she hadn’t thought she would miss. “It’s great,” she breathed, a grin slowly forming on her face as she moved the mirror around to look at the Princess’ work from all angles. Allura’s hand rested on her shoulder and her face was leveled next to hers as she carefully trimmed her bangs.

“There! Oh, you look lovely Pidge!” She clapped her hands in satisfaction and stepped back to inspect her work.

Her hair fell to the nape of her neck and the ends were a lot tamer than her old haircut - it was also made a touch more feminine by the wispy bangs and the locks that framed her face. It had enough length to pull up into a ponytail if needed, but was short enough that it was still easy to maintain.

"You work wonders, Allura." She grinned, running her fingers through her hair. It struck her how much like her mother she looked now, especially in the pictures of her when she was her age.

"I’m glad you like it! I've been wanting to do something like this for a while now but Romelle doesn't trust me with her beautiful hair."

Katie laughed at that and turned in her seat, looking down at the heap on the floor. "Can't believe it grew out that much in a year."

"You do look sweet with long hair,” Allura agreed, sweeping the hair to the side. “Why did you choose to cut it again?"

She shrugged. "I felt like I needed a change."

Allura's fingers threaded through her hair gently, fluffling out the edges and making quick trims at spots she'd missed.

"Lance always did like your hair short," she remarked casually. Katie stilled, then slowly turned her head only to be firmly righted by her stylists' hands.

"Did...he?" She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Allura hummed an affirmative and dusted bits of hair from her neck. She met her eyes the mirror.

"He missed that about you." Allura smiled gently, her eyes softening at the wide-eyed expression on her face. "Among other things."

She kept quiet, mulling over Allura's words. It was beyond her why Allura would mention her ex so offhandedly.

"I miss him too," she breathed finally, reigning in the emotions that threatened to spill. She gulped hard. "I've not been a very good friend to him."

Allura immediately hugged her from the side and Katie tensed, but she eventually  relaxed her body and lifted an arm to the alien princess'.

"Lance and I are no longer seeing each other," Allura murmured in her hair. "We went into it too quickly, and I chose to push away the instincts that told me he was already falling for you."

There was a prolonged silence before Katie finally broke out into laughter. Allura pulled away to look at her incredulously. "Lance? He hasn’t fallen for anyone but _you_."

The look on Allura's face told her that she was both unconvinced and plain _annoyed_. "Really," she said, pointedly flicking a strand of cut hair from her shirt. "Hunk wasn’t joking; the both of you are so oblivious."

Katie fiddled with a lock of hair, mulling over her words distractedly. She felt the Altean’s gaze on her, as though trying to gauge her reaction. There was so much she wanted to say, and her body honestly wasn’t coping well with the feelings in her chest that she insistently shoved down at every opportunity. The dam was going to burst eventually and she was doing nothing about it.

“...We’re not even friends,” she sighed finally, distracting herself by sweeping away the remains of her hair from her clothes. “Not anymore, I think.”

* * *

* * *

  

_A few weeks later_

 

"Call us, whenever you can."

"We'll be light-years away Dad, but I definitely will if I can," he sighed, brushing back the tear that was already forming at the corner of his eyes. His niece and nephew had each anchored themselves to one of his legs and were refusing to let go as he hugged every family member in turn.

"Do you have to go, _tio_?" Silvio whined.

The little boy's father came forward and tugged his children from Lance’s legs, but Lance waved him away. "Hey, it's okay Marco." He bent down, letting his niece run back into his arms for the umpteenth hug of the day, her brother joining close after.

"Yeah, guys...I'm sorry." His voice cracked. Rachel was next and she punched his shoulder before squeezing him in a hug that flattened the air out of his lungs.

"You better come back," she sniffled. "I'd hate you so much if you didn't."

He resisted making a promise he couldn’t keep and instead just hugged his twin. 

"Listen to Veronica," his mother said with a sigh, pulling her youngest into her arms. "Sleep well, eat whatever vegetables they give you." Lance squeezed his eyes shut and buried his nose into his mother's soft, curly hair, hoping to himself that it wouldn’t be the last he could breathe in her comforting scent or bask in her warm hugs. 

"And when you come back— " his mother whispered, hugging him tighter —"and you _will_ come back, boy — I demand to be introduced _properly_ to the Holt girl."

* * *

  

Pidge watched from aboard the Atlas as Lance and Hunk said their farewells to their families. In many ways, she was lucky: her family, even her mother, were going to be up in space with her this time. But it also meant that they weren't safely ensconced on Earth, under the careful protection of the Coalition.

She smiled as Lance bent down to gently pry his nephew off a limb before giving a shaky wave and walking right into the massive ship. Hunk followed suit, once he too had finished clinging to his parents and crying his eyes out.

"Something the matter, Katie?" James came up behind her, resting his hand on her shoulder. He followed her gaze out the window to see the two paladins tearfully parting ways with their families. "Can't imagine doing that again would be easy. Especially if you don't know if you'll ever come back."

She bit her lip at the thought, and James squeezed her shoulder. "How did your mother take it?" 

"Not very well, but she understood. Dad was in the military too, so it's not something she's unfamiliar with." 

She nodded slowly and turned to him, her brows raising to see that his eyes were slightly red. James smiled down at her and dropped his arm. "Don't look at me like that, I'm a huge momma's boy." 

"Well, we have that in common," Lance grumbled, sidling into the room with his hands in his jacket pockets. A sort of tension settled in the room that made her look from one man to the other warily. James took a sharp breath and exhaled. 

"I have to go, Katie. I think Rizavi needed help with inventory." He dropped an affectionate kiss to her temple, nodding to Lance on his way out of the room before the door slid shut behind him. 

The mild tension that hung over them before should have dissipated when James left, but instead it thickened. The silence grew overbearing - the only sounds filling the room were their soft breaths, the muted goodbyes being shared outside and the hum of the Atlas. Even her gulp sounded loud. 

Her eyes looked everywhere but at him whereas his own were entirely trained on her. She fiddled with the edge of her shirt, daring a peek under her eyelashes. He'd found a spot to lean against on the wall, and he observed her quietly. His expression was unreadable - he looked tired, as though he hadn't managed to get any sleep. 

“You’ve cut your hair,” he remarked suddenly, red-rimmed eyes watching her as she touched the ends of her locks self-consciously. 

“Allura cut it for me.” 

A question crossed his expression and she saw his lips twitch, but he chose to exhale instead. Another silence settled over them, the small talk doing little to break the tension.

 “You mentioned you had something to say to me,” she started, her voice sounding more hopeful than she intended. “That other time, on the roof.”

 She watched him blink in confusion, then recognition lit in his eyes.

“It’s nothing important,” he said, dismissively.

She felt herself deflate. “Oh.” Her gaze returned out the window as technicians closed the gates behind the civilians, preparing for take off. In the back of her mind, she figured he came to her because he had something to say. But the man she once would have easily entrusted her life with was quickly becoming a distant stranger.

She didn’t know what had caused the sudden change in his behavior. She’d be a hypocrite for hating him for his cold, distant attitude when she’d given him the same treatment only a few weeks ago, but she thought that was all behind them.

“James says that you set a new record.” She turned to face him, ignoring how he didn’t bother to meet her eyes.

He scoffed at that. “Did he?” 

She took in a quiet, deep breath, reasoning to herself that he was probably just moody from saying goodbye to his family.

The silence dragged on.

"He's awfully touchy with you," Lance finally grumbled, brushing imaginary lint off his shoulder. He didn’t need to specify who, and his tone made her bite the inside of her cheek. 

"His mother's French," she offered lamely, a little incensed at the need to explain herself. "He's like that to his friends too. When he's not in uniform." 

“Right.” 

Oh, that ticked her right off. 

"Why are you so determined to think he's a bad guy?"

"I don't think he's a _bad_ guy. I just hate how much time he demands of you." 

"He doesn't _demand_ anything!" 

“Whenever I try to meet up with you, you always say you _have_ to go on a date with him?” 

She paused at that, her lips closing with a frown. That was entirely her fault, using him as an excuse. Her breathing had gone shallow and it was making her light-headed, so she took in a deep breath to steady herself. 

“I don’t owe you an explanation, Lance.” 

She snatched her bag and made for the door, snapping “James and I broke up, he’s a close friend now” and ignoring the shocked look on his face. Right before stepping out, she added her last shot: 

“Probably more than you and I ever were.” 

* * *

 

Earth was days behind the Atlas now, but the air between them still hadn't cleared. A year ago, whenever they had their little squabbles, one of them would have approached the other for an apology. This time, none of that happened. 

Lance wasn’t as cold to her as he had been at departure, but the tension was still suffocating. It was hard to believe this was the same man she used to rough-house and be goofy with without much thought. Now, they were reduced to quietly eating across the room from each other where they’d once been exchanging video game cheat codes, and picking other sparring partners when they’d once jumped at any chance to work together. 

She'd attempted to reach out, or at least, glanced his way a few times in the hope of making eye contact, but she’d chickened out as soon as he turned his head to look her way. She knew that what she said was far too cruel and wished she had never opened her mouth at all. 

The mounting atmosphere in the massive ship grew with the crew's anticipation of a war more grim than any other in human history thus far and she couldn't afford to stall any longer; she _needed_ to apologize. But something was holding her back. 

Keith was the next of the paladins to finally notice that something was off between the two of them. 

"Are you and Lance all right?" he asked her when they were alone. He was keeping her company while she experimented with some strange rock samples she'd picked up from planets that had fallen under Haggar's regime. "I don't want to nose around, but I feel like I can't leave you two alone in the same room." 

She bit her lip and turned her attention back to the screen as she scanned a sample, frowning as the sensors beeped in their inability to recognize the composition. 

"Well, you felt right," she grumbled under her breath, knowing full well that Keith's sharp ears could hear every word. He sighed and pushed himself off the wall to face her. 

"Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not something the both of you can't get over. I need to send you two on a mission and I can't do that if you're going to be at each other's throats."

 "We don't _hate_ each other. We're just...I don't even know.” She cleared her throat, pushing back the urge to cry. “I just want my best friend back." 

"That's weird," he sighed, picking up a rock to inspect it more closely with a frown. 

"What's weird?" 

"He said the same thing." 

* * *

  

Just as Keith had observed, their synergy was not what it once was. In spars with their lions, they struggled to form the dual swords.

Shiro’s disappointed look their way when they returned to the Atlas made her want to fling herself into space. It wasn’t like she wanted this to happen - and she was certain Lance didn’t enjoy this one bit either. They really gave it their all, but every time it felt like they were making progress, their resentment, hurt and sadness would come to the fore and the connection would splinter. 

“Do I need a sit-down with the both of you?” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Katie wasn’t sure if it was the pure white hair, but the captain looked like he’d aged a full decade. “What’s the matter? Of anyone in the team, you two worked the best together. I was about to ask Keith to send you two to Medosia.”

As normal, she chose to keep quiet — but so did Lance. Risking a peek from the corner of her eye, she noticed the bags under his eyes again and felt guilt gnawing at her heart. The feeling only sharpened when he set his jaw and opened his mouth to cover for them. 

“It’s my fault,” she spoke up quickly, cutting him off. “I stayed up to study the rocks we’ve been finding in all the barren planets.” She was telling the truth. Most people just didn’t know that she was used to sleeping three hours a day. 

“Pidge, I wasn’t playing around when I mandated the seven hour rule,” Shiro chided, sounding scarily like her father in tone. She half expected him to end the sentence with ‘ _young lady’_ and send them to their rooms. “You need the sleep” 

“I still want the Medosia mission,” she insisted. “I’m sure it’ll be a major data point in my study of all those planets.” She silently hoped Lance would offer to go with her. 

Shiro hesitated and glanced over to Lance, who shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. “I’m still not letting the both of you go until you sort yourselves out.” 

“I’ll go with her,” Allura offered, coming up behind them. “Medosia is a planet I’ve visited before. I might be of some assistance.” 

Katie didn’t miss the relief on Lance’s face nor the look of gratitude he shot Allura’s way. As much as she knew they weren’t together anymore, the twist in her belly was just as present and the dull ache in her heart deepened. 

“Alright then, I’ll send the both of you off in forty minutes,” Shiro sighed, rubbing his eyes as he made his way back to the control room. Katie wondered if he kept to the seven hour rule himself. 

“I’ll suit up; go have your dinner.” Allura touched her shoulder, gave a knowing wink to Lance and walked off. 

“...Would you like dinner?” she asked hesitantly, daring to turn her head a little to judge his expression. Someone had to be the first to offer an olive branch, right? 

“I can’t,” he replied stiffly. “I’m supposed to help Veronica with something.” 

Veronica was someone she corresponded with a decent amount and she knew enough to know that she would currently be in a meeting with other analysts. Which meant that he was entirely lying to her now. 

She brushed past Lance without another word.

* * *

 

The planet Medosia was said to be one of Altea's closest allies many centuries ago. It held a level of technology comparable to that of Altea and inter-planetary alchemist conventions were a frequent occurrence. Allura had described a planet with people as vibrant as its exotic fauna and lush flora,  boasting towering white pillars and fantastical architecture that could be found nowhere else. 

It was just one of many planets completely obliterated by Haggar’s forces.

"The day before my father sealed me in the cryopod, we were due to make an emergency visit," Allura said as she guided Katie and Kosmo through the once-Galran colony. "Coran tells me the planet was hit by a unique meteorite centuries ago, exposing the planet to pure quintessence. It's the reason why life flourished so well here."

No life was flourishing now. It was eerily quiet, and their footsteps reverberated through the skeletal remains of buildings that once must have been homes, schools and places where people mingled and lived their lives peacefully. Glass and gravel crunched beneath their boots as they made their way across the decimated remains of a neighbourhood that reminded Katie of the suburb that she grew up in. Rows of homes were now gaping craters and cracked pipes poked at odd angles from the ground. 

“This planet used to be so full of color...So vibrant and full of life…” Allura murmured, her eyes misting over. 

Out of the corner of her eye, Katie noticed a glowing patch of greenery in the distance that stood out prominently amidst the piles of rubble and skeletal remains of trees and other beings that Katie didn't want to think about. She shoved her emotions to the back of her mind, focusing her gaze on the patch as she walked towards it. Kosmo bounded before her, sniffing the odd purple and yellow flowers that stubbornly grew in the tiny oasis. 

"What is it boy?" She tilted her head in curiosity. The flowers were surrounded by glowing pieces of rock, and he nosed at the glowing piles before turning to her with a whimper. Katie frowned and bent to inspect the rubble. The rocks looked familiar,  much like the ones she'd found on the other decimated planets. 

A quick analysis with her wrist computer showed it to be largely composed of elements that weren't even on the current periodic table (the updated version that she'd carefully compiled in her adventures out in space). She frowned and tapped a few more commands into her gauntlet to examine the energy further. 

"Well...that's interesting," she murmured, brows creasing as her holo-screen lit up with energy signatures. The rocks _glowed_ with an energy signature that the sensors were too unrefined to process. 

Her comms crackled and Shiro's voice filtered through. " _Pidge, just checking in on you. Have you found anything?_ " 

"Your timing’s great, Shiro. Kosmo found a pile of rubble. The energy residuals on them are off the charts. It's just...pure quintessence." 

"The Komar must’ve been here,” Allura said, walking up behind her. She knelt down to pick up a piece of the rock, closing her eyes, and Katie watched as the Princess's fingers curled tightly around the fragment of rock. It began to glow brightly but suddenly Allura dropped it with a gasp, cradling her hand to her chest. 

"Allura! What's wrong? Are you alright?" She was at her side in an instant, a hand on her back. The Princess nodded her head, frowning at the fragment. 

"That rock...it was injecting energy into me." 

Katie's brow rose. "Maybe it’s an energy source used to power Komars?"

Allura's frown deepened, "Maybe..." 

" _Allura! Pidge! Get out of there now!"_

Both paladins stood immediately, startled by Keith's panicked voice filling their helmets. Katie hurriedly plucked a sample and Kosmo teleported them back into the Atlas before they could even check their surroundings.

* * *

 

" _Dark_ quintessence?" Allura crossed her arms.

Coran rubbed his chin thoughtfully, examining the panels as the machines scanned both paladins' bodies. His voice filtered through the radio into the sealed examination room that they’d been escorted to as soon as they were on board. 

" _It's a crude description, Princess. The planet is emitting energy signatures that are highly similar to quintessence, but an opposing charge. That’s why the Atlas' sensors could not detect it at first, they weren’t designed to. Keith felt something was off and we had to reprogram the analysis models."_  

"Something like antimatter?" Pidge offered, lifting her arms as the lasers scanned her body. 

" _Similar concept, yes. However, the effects on the body are similar to that of radiation. Which is why it's critical that your bodies are not exposed to it. Least of all, you, Princess. It has only been theorized by alchemists, but it's said that should the two interact, it results in the destruction of both. It's far too risky to experiment with. Honerva attempted to many times before, but your father often intervened."_

Katie frowned at the explanation. If that theory were true, then the tiny meadow of quintessence on planet Medosia shouldn't be possible. 

An urgent beep filled the room and Katie watched as Coran's forehead wrinkled. A Garrison analyst by the Altean man's side paled and hurried from the room. 

" _Pidge...It appears your body has been exposed to it._ " 

* * *

 

 “Do you have any idea how you were exposed?” 

Katie shrugged. "I've been...examining some of the rubble from the other planets. I guess they had trace amounts of the anti-quintessence Coran was talking about. I didn't think they were harmful."

They’d placed her in a quarantine ward while they analysed the strange matter that had found its way into her body. Katie pressed her hand against the glass window of her room as she looked out at her mother. 

Colleen bit her lip and pressed her hand against the glass between them. Katie felt her throat clench up, but she gulped hard and smiled weakly for her. "I'll be _fine_ , Mom. Dr. Curie's health deteriorated _while_ she studied uranium isotopes. I’ve been doing this for a _long_ while, but I feel perfectly healthy." 

Her mother's eyes flooded with tears, but she blinked them away as she took a deep breath to collect herself. "Just rest, dear. I’ll come to keep you company whenever I can." 

“Thanks Mom,” she breathed, wishing she could hug her. 

Her father's arm rested reassuringly around his wife’s shoulders as he addressed her. "We'll be monitoring your vitals for at least a week, Katie. If you feel anything off, and I mean _anything_ young lady, you will tell us." 

She smiled weakly at her father and nodded. 

" _Pidge_?" 

Her parents raised their heads at the hesitant, breathless voice by the entrance. Her mother's brows rose but she was quick to pull her confused husband out of the room. Lance stood aside as the Holts hastily left, then turned his head towards her. 

"I hope I wasn't interrupting," he mumbled, stepping toward her hesitantly and resting his hand on the glass panel. She shook her head as she watched his eyes drift to the vital-monitoring patches on her arms and the strange looking crown on the top of her head that tracked her brain waves. His Adam's apple bobbed with a gulp and Katie felt her heart still at the worry that misted over his eyes. 

"I'm okay, Lance..." she whispered softly, resting her hand over his through the glass. "I'm just sorry that we might not be able to form Voltron-" 

"God Katie, don't even _think_ about that." 

Her cheeks flushed, and the monitors by her bed beeped quicker in tandem to her heart. It was the first time she'd ever heard him say her name. 

“I missed you so much, Lance. I never meant to say-” 

“I already forgot about it,” he breathed. “I mean, that’s a lie. I think about that a little too much. But jeez, that’s the last thing I could care about right now. I was being an ass.” 

She spied a gleam on his cheek and instantly felt moisture run down her own. 

“Promise me that…you’ll focus on getting better. Or not just not falling sick,” he mumbled lamely. Her fingers twitched with the need to hug him. She loved his hugs – they were warm, comforting and relaxed her in a way that she was sure he wasn’t even aware of. Though she did a good job of disguising it, there was an ever-present fear deep in her chest that she might die. Not that she did not expect that with going into a war – but dying from her experimentation was not something she wanted. 

“I promise,” she sniffled, wiping her hand over tears. 

“ _Lance, report to Control.”_  

She watched as his shoulders slumped, looking over to the speaker in annoyance. “I should go, Shiro isn’t happy with me as it is.” 

She nodded quietly, watching his hands curl against hers on the glass before reluctantly pulling away. Just as Lance turned, a certain surge of courage overcame her. 

“Lance!” she called out, her heart monitor setting off incessant beeping to alert the staff. 

Lance turned back in alarm, “Pidge?! What’s wrong?” 

A technician was going to come by any moment now to check on her, and then she would’ve missed her chance. Or worse, she could die in the next few hours and then he would never, ever know. Her nails bit into her palms and she took a large gulp of air, trying to calm her racing heart before forcing her lips to spit out the words she’d struggled so hard to admit to herself. 

“...I love you.”

* * *

 

 

It was with deep, gasping breaths that she woke up, her hands scrabbling at her throat where she'd felt her windpipes crush under Haggar's relentless grip. Sweat ran down her back, sticking her medical gown to her clammy skin. She threw off the covers and leaned forward, resting her head in her hands and feeling her shoulders shake. 

Nightmares weren't uncommon, but this one had been particularly vivid. She shook her head and pulled herself out of bed towards the ensuite. After splashing cold water on her face, she returned to her bed and slumped back with a sigh.

She wanted Lance. 

Back on the Castle, Lance had always been the one to comfort her. Whenever she missed her family, had to scrap projects she'd worked on for months, or had nightmares, his hugs were what she craved the most. She missed how he would let her curl up in his arms and calm her with his heart beats right over her ear. 

She thought back to his pale face earlier, horrified at her confession, and the dam finally broke. She burst into tears. 

"Oh goodness! Pidge?" Allura's voice broke through, startling her. Her hands pressed against the glass, her silver brows knitted. "Are you hurting, shall I call a medic?" She was still dressed in her pink paladin uniform, dark circles underneath her own eyes. It seemed that even Alteans weren't spared of the effects of insomnia. 

"No! I'm alright," she sniffled, quickly wiping the tears from her eyes tiredly. "I'm...frustrated. I've got nothing to do but be holed up all day and I think it’s kind of driving me up the wall." And she was being left alone with her thoughts, she'd wanted to add. With no work to distract her racing mind, she was forced to confront the whirlpool of emotions that sapped at her energy. 

Allura glanced over the external monitors, taking mental notes of her vitals before sighing in relief at the lack of changes in her critical readings. Her voice softened to a soft sisterly tone that made Katie want to curl up in her arms for a hug. "You do have abnormal levels of stress hormones, is something the matter?" 

Katie chewed at her bottom lip and winced as the sharp taste of iron bloomed on her tongue. Allura's wide eyes were on her, ready to offer any assistance if she needed. Her voice came gently, as though she was afraid of alarming her.

“Is it...Lance-related?” 

“What?! No!” 

She winced at the high pitch her voice took, but it didn’t matter. The look the princess gave her was enough indication that she didn't believe her. “What do you need?” she asked patiently, moving from the monitors to stand closer to her. 

"My computer - it has all my data - I can still work on examining the strange rocks without touching them," she sighed finally. Allura frowned at that - evidently expecting something else - but she nodded and went off to fetch it for her. 

She eventually returned, arms piled high with some of her equipment, extra blankets and even a bag full of treats she'd managed to sneak from the commissary. Balancing the contraband on one arm, she made quick work of the commands to open the door without alerting the medical team.  
  
"I figured you'd tire of the flavorless goop they feed you," she said with a smile, walking into the room without much of a care and ignoring Katie’s protests at the proximity. "It's been more than a week, the 'radiation' hasn't adversely affected your vitals in any way. I'd imagine the spike in stress would come from isolation and restlessness - oh, do stop running away from me! You won't get me 'infected'."  
  
"It's still a good precaution!" Katie insisted, pressing herself up against the wall as Allura attempted to get closer. The Princess rolled her eyes and dropped the pile of equipment to the foot of her bed. Instead of heading out, she sat down heavily with a sigh. 

"Keith told me it's unlikely that my Altean biology would be affected by it. Human bodies just seem to be more sponge-like - so easily impacted by the environment they are put in."

Katie had to smile at that. "We're pretty resilient, I'd say." 

" _You_ are, that's for certain," Allura offered, giving her a weak smile. The Princess patted the space next to her and Katie hesitated for a moment before giving in. As she sunk down on the mattress, Allura opened a bag of biscuits she recognized to be the ones they'd bake together. 

"Coran loved them, by the way. I made some for you as well as your mother said they were your favorite." 

She felt something in her melt and the tears that she'd been tightly reining in finally fell. Allura put aside the cookies in alarm and touched her shoulder gently. She leaned forward and Allura quickly pulled her into a tight hug. It wasn't until she'd cried her fill and lifted her head did she see that tears were streaming down Allura's own cheeks. 

"Allura!" she gasped, wiping the moisture from her cheeks immediately, forgetting her own troubles and sitting up. "I'm so sorry I never -"

"Pidge, please. It is cathartic to me to have a friend to cry with. You do not know how much I needed this." 

Allura wiped her eyes and sighed.

“Between the colony Altean escaping last night and-” 

“ _What?!_ ”

Allura shook her head and gave her an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I completely forget how closed off to everything you are. She escaped last night in one of the emergency pods. We only hope she doesn’t find Haggar before us.” She wiped away her tears and looked out to her reflection on the glass window. "I always feel guilty for feeling blue. I have a greater responsibility, I shouldn’t waste any time feeling sorry for myself." 

"With all due respect, Allura, you're not wasting time. It's entirely for your own benefit," Katie insisted, pulling herself closer to the Princess. "Did you ever fault me for crying over not being able to find my family?" 

"Of course not!"

"Then I don't think anyone in their right mind would ever think less of you for that. You've been through so much Allura. I don't think I could cope half as well as you do with the kinds of things you’ve had to live through."

Allura bit her lip and pulled herself to sit cross-legged on the bed. Katie reached behind her and pulled one of the many blankets her mother had supplied and tucked it carefully around her shoulders, leaving one arm curled around the young, burdened royal. 

"You lost so much of your people, that purple jerkface broke your heart and Voltron’s trust and I'm pretty sure there's so much more that I'm not aware of because I'm too busy thinking about me." She sighed and leaned her head on Allura's shoulder. "I...I'm not good at this sort of thing, but, I _know_ the other paladins would do anything for you. They wouldn't be happy to know you decided to take on the burden of the universe on your own. That's what Voltron is there for - and now, the Atlas and the Coalition too."

A comfortable silence filled the room and Allura turned her head to press a weak kiss to her temple. 

“Thank you, Pidge,” she whispered, eyes soft with sentiment that the old Katie would have recoiled from. “I’m glad you’re on the team.” 

“I’m glad you are too. Can get to be too much of a sausage party sometimes, if you know what I mean.”

Allura laughed good-naturedly at that, to her surprise. The Princess reached for her hand and Katie squeezed it in return gently. 

* * *

 

When Hunk told him there was a bar on the ship, he couldn’t believe his ears. But as he walked into the dimly lit lounge, he felt like he was transported into another realm. Soft peach lights accented the walls and black chairs surrounded small metal tables where a few Garrison soldiers congregated in small groups bent over drinks,. He made his way to the bar, where all the stools stood unoccupied and the lone bartender re-arranged shot glasses. 

The Atlas’ bartender looked vaguely familiar and it didn’t take him long to realize why. Her dark hair was up in a careless top knot, too much like the kind Pidge wore when she had thrown herself into a project and was neglecting basic hygiene. But most of all, even in the dim lights of the bar, he could see that she had honey-tinted eyes. He covered his face and groaned. 

Everywhere he went, there was going to be someone who was going to remind him of her. 

“Rough night?” the woman asked him bemusedly as she polished a glass. He merely shrugged and gave her his order. She poured it up and slid it his way.

“The girl I was too dumb to see that I’ve been in love with for _years_ told me that she’s in love with me.”

“That’s amazing!” 

“She’s in a quarantine chamber, possibly days away from death. But that’s not all-” 

He paused as he finished off the rest of his drink and slammed the shot glass on the counter. “You know what I did? After she pulled together the courage to tell me that? I ran out on her. Like a fucking _coward_.”

She blinked at that, but recovered and tutted sympathetically. The young woman leaned forward to pat his shoulder. “That’s rough buddy.”

She deftly poured a few shots into the mixer, then poured him another drink. 

“It’s on the house.” 

Lance raised the glass to her and downed it in one go. He didn’t even wince at the burning sensation that gripped his throat. If anything, he welcomed it. He raised the empty glass at her again in a gesture for another. 

“I can’t believe they serve alcohol on a warship.” 

“Well, it’s not really alcohol. It’s like _synthehol_.” 

Seeing the blank look on his face, she continued. “It’s synthetic. You get the buzz, maybe not as strong as the real stuff, but the best part is that there’s no hangover.” 

Lance nodded slowly, peering down at his glass forlornly. He didn’t see the gentle expression on the bartender’s face. 

“Y’know, my dad gave me some pretty good love advice,” she offered conversationally as she poured another drink and set it before him. 

“Yeah?” 

She reached for another glass to polish. “He said love was about being vulnerable, about finding your best friend.” 

He resisted rolling his eyes. “I could have told you that. No offense to your pops, but it’s not like I can expect my best friend to love me back when I want her to. I’ve realized it too late, and now I can’t be with her.” 

She shrugged. “I would have thought a Paladin of Voltron would have had bigger guts than that.” 

He wasn’t sure if it was the title or the second shot that made him wince. But the young woman didn’t falter. 

“Well, what you’re telling me is you found your best friend.” She set the glass firmly down and bent to look at him directly in the eye. “You’re telling me she’s in love with you, and I imagine she’d gotten pretty tired of waiting. But love doesn’t just fade away like that...especially if she felt the need to confess to you.” 

Lance lifted a brow at her insistent tone, but he listened intently all the same. He could feel the alcohol taking effect and slight fear in his heart quickly buried underneath the haze of mild drunkenness.

“I... can’t.” 

“Why can’t you?” 

He pouted in an almost childlike manner and played with his glass. 

“Because she deserves better.” 

Something whacked him over the head and he yelped. 

“Well, the both of you are right _gurkels_.” 

He turned to glare at the offender, but his eyes widened instead. “Allura?!” 

There she was, standing with her arms akimbo and her beautiful blue eyes flashing with anger. “We did not break up for you to be _schmoozing_ in a bar, feeling sorry for yourself!” 

As Allura yelled at him, attracting the attention of onlookers, Lance noticed her disheveled hair. 

“She told you she _loved_ you and you run away?! Honestly, I have a half a mind to throw you into the trash compactors and fling you across the galaxy!” 

“I know I'm an idiot!” he protested weakly, grimacing at the amused look on the bartender's face. 

“You look like you could use a drink too,” the bartender offered, clearly feeling no fear for the Altean. His eyes widened as Allura's frown deepened, her glare still fixated on him, and he braced himself for her wrath only to hear her defeated sigh. 

“A jug of nunvil, please.” 

“Coming right up, ma'am.” 

The bartender poured her the drink and disappeared behind the black door, a cloak slung over her shoulder. 

Lance watched with a fearful awe as easily chugged the alien liquor down like it was water. She slammed the jug down and sighed. 

“...better?”

“Not really. I'm probably going to regret this once the night cycle's complete.” She wiped her mouth in a way that made Lance raise his brows. But he didn't have time to worry over her lack of table manners when she returned her glare to him.

“ _You_. You will tell that poor girl how you feel or so help me,” she hissed, grabbing his collar and dragging him closer. Once upon a time, it would have excited him. Now he felt nothing but pure fear.

“If I die in this war and Pidge _still_ doesn’t know you love her, _trust_ that I will come and haunt you for the rest of your life.”

* * *

 

Her parents and Allura had been her most frequent visitors - keeping her company almost on the daily. Hunk would pop in from time to time to slip her more contraband; typically in the form of cookies, spare tech parts that she could tinker with, and even a few comic books. Keith often accompanied him, looking the other way as her best friend passed the banned items into her room and keeping her up-to-date with battle plans, the going-ons above deck, and offering her the occasional “good night”.

Lance never showed up.

She tried not to let it bother her, but that was an impossible feat. One step forward, ten steps back. They’d just forgiven each other and now they were back to square one?

After what felt like months - but was only about three weeks - Katie was given the all-clear. There would be no more days stewing all by herself in the room, craving human touch and hating how isolated she was from all the action. She was looking forward to throwing herself into her work as she always did, tirelessly continuing her research, formulating models and working on a new override program that she was sure would come in handy one day.

The day she was released from her isolation chamber was ridiculously ceremonial. The technician ran through the final scans, commenting off-handedly about how her body’s biorhythms had remained unchanged by the “dark” quintessence. After quickly glancing over her, he signed the release form with a flourish and hit the commands to open the door.

As soon as she stepped over the threshold, her mother tackled her with a tight, crushing hug.

“Mom! I can’t...breathe..”

“Honey,” her father chuckled, trying his best to gently pry her mother off of her. The moment air began to enter her lungs again, her father gave her an equally tight hug, much to the annoyance of his wife, and Katie finally noticed the other paladins - all of them, except Lance - waiting quietly by the door.

“Ready for action, Pidge?” Keith smirked, bending down to give her a brotherly hug that, with a pang in her chest, made her think of Matt.

“ _Quiznak_ , I thought you’d never ask.”

“I’m sorry, but I just need to run a few more tests.” The technician looked sheepish at breaking up her reunion. Katie watched her family - and truly, _all_ of them were her family - reluctantly leave her.

“ _Pidge!”_

The voice down the hallway made her heart stop. Lance pushed past an annoyed Keith to lean against the doorway. He was panting and looked like he’d run from one end of the Atlas to the other.

“James reminded me they were discharging you today,” he said after taking a heavy breath and righting himself. He was still wearing his paladin armor, likely back from a drill practice with the MFEs. “I’m a dunce, I completely forgot.”

She doesn’t know where she found the strength to hold herself back from throwing herself into his arms; but her feet were rooted to the spot because she was just so _relieved_ she hadn’t completely destroyed their relationship.

“It’s okay,” she heard herself whisper. His eyes softened and his lips parted. Her brain, logic abandoned for once, screamed at her to hug him. She wouldn’t even care if he smudged her favorite pajamas with the soot on his armor. But before she could take one step closer to him, the technician coughed and pointedly looked towards the attached examination room.

“Go,” Lance said with a nod. “I’ll wait right here. However long it takes.” 

* * *

 

“Boyfriend?” the technician asked with amusement as he prepped a syringe for the blood draw. She blushed and shook her head, wincing as the needle pricked at her arm.

“Really? Wouldn’t have thought so. He’s always sleeping in the main control room when you’re asleep.” 

She turned to him in shock, nearly knocking the full syringe from his hands. He caught it in the nick of time. 

“Ah, I guess you weren't aware. He’s usually gone by the time I come in to check after the night cycle. Can’t be comfortable sleeping on that metal bench.” 

Her mind reeled; the urge to run out of the room to him growing overbearing. But before her bare feet could even hit the cool metal floor, the room’s door slid open and in walked the captain of the vessel. 

“Shiro?” 

“Pidge,” he breathed, looking apologetically over to the technician. “I know you’ve only just been discharged but-” 

“But nothing, I want to get right back into things. What do you need?” 

“We lost coordinates on the Altean escape pod. I have a feeling it’s because she found and disabled the positioning system.” 

“Have you tried tracking the quintessence trails from the boosters?” 

“We did, but there were several trails and we couldn’t narrow it down.” 

She bit her lip. “How about reprogramming the sensors to pick up aluminium and hydrochloric acid? I’m sure only Earth-made vessels give off those by-products.”

Shiro blinked and smiled. “I knew I should have come to you ages ago.” Lance poked his head in from behind, giving her soft, proud smile.

“Am I good to go?” She turned to the technician who hesitated but shrugged.

Shiro glanced from between her and Lance and an unspoken thought crossed over his eyes. “I’ll wait for you at Control.” 

The door panel slid closed in the room after Shiro and the technician, leaving just her and Lance. 

“Pidge…” 

“Don’t say anything more,” she interjected, rubbing unconsciously over where they’d pricked her arm for blood. “I know what I said, but I don’t want to hear your response. Not just yet.”

She looked up to him, and she saw the conflict and the restraint in his eyes. If he wanted to reject her, she’d rather die not knowing about it. He leaned against the door ledge resignedly instead, watching her. He was holding himself back, she could tell.

“I’m just happy to talk to my best friend again.” She lifted her eyes to meet his, arms close to her chest as though to shield herself.

A slow, genuine smile began to light his face, reaching his eyes. “I am too.” He pushed himself off the door and made for her. She was glad that she was no longer hooked up to heart monitors or they’d be going off again as an instinctive panic clawed its way up her throat. 

Even if she'd been _yearning_ for a hug from him for nearly a year now, she suddenly wasn’t ready for this. 

“I- I have to go! Shiro needed my help!” 

“Pidge, _wait_!” 

If there was one time she was glad for her tiny stature, it was then. She dipped under his arm and ran out the door.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I took this long. I've been writing and writing and this fic...just blew up. Like, I had to split the second chapter in two or it would have been way too much crammed into one. 
> 
> Hope you've enjoyed reading this! Let me know your thoughts ^^
> 
> Also, massive shoutout to hailqiqi for being the beta to end betas. You wouldn't believe the train wreck this fic was before she did her magic.


	3. Chapter 3

The Atlas was in a frenzy. Compared to the relative calm of her quarantine ward, above deck was a maelstrom of tension and anxiety. Garrison analysts and Coalition members dashed about, shouting orders, scanning charts and reporting their findings to the wrung-out Shiro who stood above them all at the helm. Her father was next to him, poring over celestial maps.

"Katie!" Her mother waved her over from the other end of the room, then led her down a wide, familiar hallway to the labs. "Coran and I have been taking over some of your research. We think Keith might have helped us make a breakthrough.” Her mother ushered her into her own, unofficial lab where Coran and Keith were bent over datapads, the samples spread out on the table. Kosmo sat by their feet, quietly observing.

“Welcome back, Number Five!” Coran greeted her cheerily. Katie gave him a grateful smile as she joined him.

“Keith? You found something?” She turned to the red paladin.

He nodded and moved to pick up a sample, frowning down at it. “I thought this looked familiar. It bothered me for days the first time I looked at them but I finally remember now.” He leaned down to let Kosmo sniff it and the wolf nudged his hand in a sort of affirmation. “Kosmo was surrounded by these rocks when I first found him. I _knew_ the energy signatures were familiar, but I couldn’t pin down why.”

Coran looked up from his datapad. “I’ve analysed the vibrational frequency of the molecules in the rocks. When the ‘dark quintessence’ flows through them, they vibrate at speeds too fast for the nanoscopes to measure. But we have reason to believe that it theoretically surpasses the speed of light.”

“That’s ridiculous,” she said, her eyes widening. “Only photons can do that!”

“Yes, but it makes sense in _this_ case. In order for any matter to transcend into another reality, it has to break the speed of light.”

A new, but familiar voice chipped in from the back. “Are you saying that Haggar is trying to get into another reality? What for?”

Her eyes landed on Lance leaning against the far wall. It appeared that he’d been there the entire time, quietly listening in on them.

“No, Lance,” she breathed, quietly shifting all her focus away from him and to the matter at hand. “I don’t think she was intending to. It seems more like rubble left there _after_ Haggar made her ‘visits’.”

“It doesn’t make much sense to destroy a planet and then re-inject the quintessence back into it,” Keith said with a sigh, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

Lance spoke up again, “What if she _is_ trying to do that?” Keith rolled his eyes at him, but he continued with a scowl. “What? It’s like after tearing down a forest, you plant new trees in its place so you’ll have resources to return to.”

The room quieted.

“Lance...might be onto something,” she said, her mind whirling as she thought back to Allura complaining about the rocks injecting quintessence. “Coran! What if we’ve been looking at this all wrong? What if the opposing charge is the compound charging itself so it can _generate_ more quintessence with the residual energy?”

“I thought we can’t create energy.” Keith scratched his head.

“We’re not trying to create energy though. I think those rocks are catalysts that set off reactions using the residual quintessence. Like Lance’s analogy, planting new sources in place so it’ll regenerate itself - _healing_ the planet in the process,” she replied, frowning down at the charts. The theory made sense but the motivations behind leaving the rocks in the first place weren’t entirely clear to her.

“Here’s the odd thing Katie: there were traces of hydrochloric acid and aluminium in the soil samples.” Her mother pointed to the images on the datapad. “The probes even found remnants of footprints that look human or, at the very least, humanoid.”

“They weren’t from the Atlas? A colony Altean?”

Coran shook his head. “No, not at all. There were even micro-organisms that were similar to Earth species, nitrous compounds and even traces of Earth minerals.”

“So...an Earth-based ship was there, _before_ us? But how can that be? No man-made craft’s made it out of the Milky Way besides the Atlas.”

“Should we...do something about it?” Colleen looked over to Keith, who merely shrugged.

“I mean, it doesn’t seem like it’s particularly dangerous. If anything, restoring the planet’s quintessence seems like a good thing. If- _When_ we defeat Haggar, it’d do more good than harm.”

Everyone turned to look at Katie next and she blanched. “Don’t look at me, I’m learning about this at the same time as you guys.” She peered over Coran’s arm to look at his datapad, frowning at the figures displayed. “Um, well...I do think Keith’s right. Don’t see much of a point in getting rid of them.”

“We’ll keep an eye on them regardless, I’ll send the occasional probe to monitor its progress,” Coran said, entering a few commands into a panel.

Keith folded his arms and nodded. “Alright then, what’s the status on the escape pod trackers?”

“They’re still scanning the area. We’re working on a ninety-seven percent confidence interval that we’ll get results within the next six hours.”

“What do we do until then?”

Coran looked solemn. “We prepare for the worst.”

* * *

 

"You're getting a little rusty there, Serrano." Lance rolled his eyes and dodged James' fist. He lifted his staff and launched himself forward, but his opponent had grown used to his tactic and countered it with his own staff. "Has the pilot surpassed the paladin?"

James laughed, dodging Lance's next counter with frustrating ease.

"Lance, beat his arrogant ass, _please_ ," Nadia groaned, stretching back against a bench at the other end of the training room. Ina sipped on her water quietly next to her, observing the fight with cool eyes - likely filing away their favored moves for future use.

James' body jerked forward in a surprisingly aggressive move for him, and Lance nearly lost his grip on his staff. But he twisted his arm, successfully disarming him, laughing breathlessly as the MFE pilot grunted in annoyance. "You're one to talk pretty boy, you slipped there." Lance straightened his back, smirking with the victory. Off to the side, Ryan lifted his arm, indicating a break.

He threw his staff down and peeled off his soaked shirt as he walked towards his bench, wiping the sweat off his face with a towel. From the corner of his eye, he could see that James had done the same, pouring water on his flushed face to cool off.  
  
Lance couldn't help letting his eyes drift to the defined lines of his chest and down to his abdomen. James was a little more built than he was and a brief, ridiculous mental image of Pidge lounging against that very bare chest created a surge of jealousy that made him nauseous. He averted his eyes just as James turned towards him, raising an eyebrow at his tense body.

"You good for another round?"

"Sure," he grumbled, twisting the cap of his water bottle a little too tightly. As he turned to set his towel down, he heard soft, distinctive laughter he'd recognize anywhere, and the longing to pull her into his arms and tell her everything he'd been bottling up hit him like an ion cannon.  
  
_“Hey Pidge! Finally out of the slammer?”_  
  
_“Something like that. I’m beginning to think they only threw me in there so I don’t talk over the other Garrison analysts.”_  
  
He watched as Nadia shifted to make room for her, ignoring her protests and tugging her onto the bench. Both women glanced their way and he froze, then Nadia leaned forward and whispered something in her ear. Pidge pushed her away, her face red while Nadia laughed indulgently.  
  
"So," James began primly. "Are you two an item now?" He tilted his head towards Pidge who not-very-discreetly glanced their way. He didn't miss how her eyes briefly ran down his body and he felt his chest puff with machismo.  
  
"No," he said with a sigh, bending down to pick up his staff. He could feel James' incredulous stare on the back of his head.  
  
Kinkade snapped his fingers and pointed back to the floor. James lifted his staff, a sly look coming to his eyes that Lance did not like one bit. He took a defensive stance, and Lance mirrored it, eyes briefly darting towards Pidge and back to James. Ryan's hand fell and both men lunged towards each other.

James went straight for his hip, catching him off guard. He winced as the staff made contact. With renewed fervor, Lance swung out, throwing him to the floor and following up with an attempted pin that James blocked with his own staff.

“Well, if you aren't careful,” James breathed, “I might swoop in and get her for myself.” He smirked up at him, then pushed upward, disarming him once again. Lance growled in irritation as Ryan lifted an arm. Another point for James.

He picked up and twirled his staff, watching as the MFE captain stretched his back muscles and threw a charming smile Pidge’s way. Lance didn’t want to see her reaction. “Careful, you’ll pop a vein,” he grumbled under his breath, lunging forward as soon as the signal was given. This time, he struck at him directly, locking his blocking move in his arms and twisting his arm. But James locked his leg around his calf and he fell flat to the floor.

“You’re taking your time,” James grunted. “If not me, it’ll be someone else.”

Lance bit the inside of his cheek and his fist gripped his staff as he pulled himself up, knuckles turning white with strain.

“I don’t want to push her,” he hissed, ducking a foward strike and hitting him square across the abdomen. He smirked as James hissed in pain but it disappeared as his eyes flashed. This time, James went for his stomach and Lance lunged head-on, not caring at all if it was a risky (and plain stupid) counter. Keith would definitely berate him over it if he caught wind of it.

Sure enough, James knocked the wind out of him. He fell on his back again, staff falling flat on his stomach. He sighed in frustration and pushed himself up by the elbows. Off at the side, he heard Nadia reassuring Pidge.

_“It can get painful, but it’s not unbearable. He’ll live, don’t worry.”_

He closed his eyes tightly. He did _not_ want to have the girl he loved watch him lose to her ex.

“Get up, Serrano.” James stood over him, arms crossed. In a voice low enough so only he could hear, he mumbled. “Make me rethink I have a chance.”

Lance’s brows rose.

“You’re on.” He jumped up. James adjusted the bandages on his fist, his gaze unwavering. Half the fight is psychological, Lance reminded himself, and he delivered a glare in return, stretching out his broad shoulders.

Kinkade gave the signal and their staffs clashed once more. “Why are you waiting around for her anyway? You should have made your move ages ago,” James taunted between pants. He hit him across his knee and Lance grunted, holding his leg firm with willpower alone. He heard a breath hitch - Pidge’s, he was sure - and a fire lit deep in his belly. In one quick sweep, he aimed for the hip again. James wasn’t as quick this time, and he pounced at the opportunity: pressing the attack and using sheer physical strength to knock his opponent to the floor.

James looked up at him wide-eyed, not knowing where the beast had come from. Lance shrugged.

“She makes the rules,” he said, smirking over him with a hand held out to help him up.

“You’re not even together and you’re already whipped.” James sighed, reaching up for Lance’s hand. As James pulled himself up, Lance finally allowed himself to look over at Pidge. She was beaming at him now, and he felt a dopey smile find its way onto his lips.

A staff knocked him off his feet and he glared up at James, who was chuckling.

“You _kinda_ took my girlfriend from me, I think I deserved a shot like that.”

Lance rolled his eyes but accepted his outstretched hand.

* * *

 

The MFEs eventually left together, leaving both of them alone in the expansive training room. Katie didn’t know exactly why she had decided to seek him out, but the moment she saw him take off his shirt, all logical reasoning had flown out the window.

There was something to be said about Lance’s physique, even though she didn’t know how to express it. She knew _exactly_ how the flat planes of his chest felt against her fingertips. How powerful his arms felt curled around her, and how his deceptively lanky frame was rippled with muscles, even moreso now he was leaving his boyhood behind.

There was a new tension between them now. Not entirely something she’d say was uncomfortable, but it definitely made her nervous - a good sort of nervous. Was it normal for best buddies to have this weird electric atmosphere about them?

“That looked like it hurt,” she lifted her head to indicate the bruises on his side. Lance brushed over them and shrugged.

“Nothing out of the ordinary. I still think that training simulation in the Castle back when we were still getting the hang of things was more brutal.”

She winced but eventually smiled at the memory. “Y’know, I never pinned you as a good short-range fighter, but you’re getting there,” she began, crossing her arms across her chest as she skirted around the training mats.

“Are you actually complimenting me?” A wide, surprised smile was blooming on his face.

“I compliment you! Sometimes.” _In my head_ , she wanted to add.

“Right,” he laughed.

But it didn’t look it bothered him much since he was already walking towards her. She gulped. A part of her wished he would wear his shirt again, but another part of her swooned at the lines of his taut stomach that she couldn’t stop stealing glances at, the slight dip along his hip bone where his sweats hung off loosely...

He threw his shirt over his shoulder and tousled his hair in a way that really shouldn’t be that attractive to her. “After I hit the showers, do you want to hang out? Not like you’ll be sleeping anyway.”

He winked and she was a goner. But then she remembered where they were and her shoulders slumped. “The results of Coran’s analysis should be back by then. We might have to go investigate or worse still…”

“Suit up,” he finished with a sigh. His brows knitted in worry and a sense of dread came over her. “Pidge...I know that you aren't comfortable with me speaking about it yet but-”

Her feet already angled towards the door.

But before he could continue, a voice crackled from her wrist. _“Pidge? Could you come down to the labs please? I need to speak with you urgently.”_

“I’ll be right there Allura!”

He reached out to grab her arm, but she had already dashed out of the room in a green blur.

* * *

 

“Are you _sure_ it’s Haggar?”

“Absolutely positive, Pidge.”

Katie nervously fumbled with the cuffs of her paladin uniform, forcing her rational side to take over before her fears could. She watched as Allura bit her lip, white brows knitting as she immersed herself in her thoughts.  “I still get nightmares about Lotor, you know. And these dreams...they almost feel _prophetic._ When I saw Haggar as...Honerva, I-I’ve come to believe, that it must be so.”

Katie’s jaw dropped while Allura looked about her nervously. They were the only two in the labs, the night cycle only minutes away. But anyone could walk in through the door. “I’m not sure if I want Coran to know about this. An Altean using other Alteans as pawns? Why would she ever do that?”

“Power corrupts people in more ways than one Allura. You don’t need magical cosmic energy for that. Back on Earth, you only need money, fame and just... _greed_.”

Allura sighed and shook her head. “But it just doesn’t make sense! She was one of the most brilliant alchemists of her time! She was married to an Galran Emperor! What _more_ could she want?!”

“Her...family?” Both women turned to the voice behind them. Hunk lifted a shoulder. “I mean, just playing devil’s advocate here, but her husband and her son _were_ taken from her.”

Allura considered it for a bit and Katie watched her shoulders slump. “She probably does think we’ve killed Lotor.”

“We kind of did, in a way,” Katie spoke carefully, gently touching Allura’s shoulder. “But motivations aside, we know that she won’t stop at nothing until Voltron is destroyed. It’s a symbol of hope, like you said before. But to her, it’s probably a reminder of her family’s death.”

“What were you guys talking about anyway?” Hunk wondered, seating himself on the bench across them. “I only caught the tail end of the conversation.”

“Allura had a nightmare. Haggar...she was strangling me,” Katie felt herself pale and the very-real feeling of bony fingers curling around her neck returned. She shivered but shook her head to rid herself of the thought. “I wouldn’t have thought anything about it, but then, I had the exact same one when I was quarantined. I was sure it was nothing but the fears in my subconscious manifesting in my dreams but then Allura’s been having the same dreams too and sometimes, the events _match_.”

“Match?” Hunk paled.

“I’ve also seen Pidge struck by Haggar and she’s seen me facing Haggar in a rift.”

“You’re not thinking...it’ll _actually_ happen, do you?” he looked worriedly from one lady to the next. Katie felt herself shrug, but she had long accepted the vision - pushing it to the back of her thoughts as she always did to focus on the now.

“I wonder if it’s a side effect of the ‘dark’ quintessence,” Allura spoke up suddenly, turning to her with her eyes wide.

“We are the only two seeing visions,” she nodded slowly in agreement. “I’ll research it some more, tonight.”

Just then, the door to the labs slid open and in tumbled an extremely winded Coran. “ _Princess_!”

Allura stood up from her seat in alarm. “Coran? What’s the matter?”

“We’ve found the mother ship.”

* * *

 

If the Atlas was in a frenzy before, it was absolute _chaos_ now. A more regimented, organized form of chaos that Katie embraced and had grown accustomed to since the first day she left Earth.

A branch of the Coalition had run into Haggar’s forces before them and had launched into a full attack to give them time to gear up. Garrison officials ran from one end of the room to the next, shouting orders and preparing fighter pilots for take-off.

Katie made a mad dash for her hanger, but passing the red lion’s hangar made her steps falter. For a few seconds, she deliberated entering. But the door slid open and the very subject of her deliberations stared down at her. The anxious look on his face the only thing keeping her from taking off again. Despite the chaos that went on overhead, the stillness in the hangars was unnerving.

Lance’s lips parted and she was quick to stop him. “Please don’t say anything,” she begged. “I mean it, I don’t want to hear _anything_ about it.”

“Do you regret it?” he demanded.

“No! Not at all!”

“Then why won’t you let me-”

“Lance, this is the _worst_ possible time!”

“This may be our _only_ time left!” It had to be the first time he raised his voice at her and she felt herself take a step back. He winced and closed his eyes, mumbling a soft apology under his breath.

“I just didn’t want us to go into this war all awkward and tense. I...I just want my best friend,” she mumbled, looking to the floor. Beneath her, she heard the whirs of the Atlas’ engines firing up.

“You _have_ your best friend, Katie,” she ignored the flutter in heart as he sighed and spoke her name softly. “I’m not ever going to let anything change that. And I _really_ need to tell you-”

Panic cemented her heart once more.

“ _Lance_ ,”

“But-”

“After all this,” she pleaded. “If we both survive. _Please_.”

“What if I don’t?”

She gaped for a bit and then blinked. “Well then, you better make sure you do.”

He slowly shook his head. Lance was losing his patience with her but he listened.  But she knew she won. But he gave in and sighed. “Quiznack, you drive me _nuts_.”

He parted his arms, looking at her with the question clear in his eyes. Her heart thundered in her chest but she willed herself from running away again. She _wanted_ this; craved this the day she stopped returning his calls back on Earth. She waited far too long for it.

She took a shy step forward, and Lance closed the distance for her. He engulfed her and her body melted to his. She wrapped her arms around his hips, gasping as her feet left the floor. Lance lifted her effortlessly and squeezed her tightly. She wished she’d hugged him sooner and not in the confines of their paladin armor. But she wasn’t about to be picky. She brought her arms up to his shoulders, supporting herself against his body. Her nose buried to his neck, feeling the quick throb of his pulse against her cheek as he curled his body closer to hers as much as he could.

They didn’t have to speak. Everything they wanted to say expressed in how tightly they held onto each other; in the way he held her so close and in the way she held onto him for dear life. She desperately hoped that she didn’t make a mistake in waiting to hear his answer but she knew she didn’t need it as much as she needed his friendship.

He gently set her down after several moments, leaving his arms around her and their proximity close. Katie felt his fingers on her cheek, gently nudging her chin upward so she would look up at him. He leaned forward, bringing his head closer to hers. If it weren’t for the warm hold he’s captured her in, she’d be running.

Just as his warm breath ghosted over her lips, the sirens went off.

 

* * *

 

An explosion.

_C'mon...c'mon..._

She heard a scream of pain and winced, forcing herself to direct all her attention to the screen before her. With all the chaos that ravaged outside, the relative calm in the ship unnerved her. Each explosion reverberated in the echo-y chambers of the giant vessel and the console shook with each impact.

Kosmo whined at her feet, as though beckoning her to hurry.

"I'm trying boy, but the encryption on this system is ridiculous."

A solution came to her just as a partially destroyed ship flung itself onto the front glass panel of the room. She grasped the edge of the console, gasping as the impact left a ringing in her ears. She didn't want to know what ship hit them - but she vehemently pushed away the thought that it briefly looked to be one of their own. Kosmo nudged her, concerned.

"I'm fine," she breathed, grasping her helmeted head to steady herself.

Sweat trailed a cool path down her clammy back, eventually soaking into her damaged suit. She was certain that her oxygen tanks were depleting quickly, but she didn’t have time to worry about it. She had a job to get done and she was going to stop at nothing to finish it.

Her comms crackled to life and the voice that filtered through jump started her heart.

" _Shiro! Keith! Allura needs cover. There's an opening, I'm going in!"_

" _Be careful Lance."_

_"The MFEs will cover you."_

" _I'll be right behind you, man."_

" _Thanks guys...Pidge. Katie?"_

Her breath hitched, her heart pounding in her chest, she sputtered a response. "Y-yeah?"

She heard him take a heavy breath and the clicks of the other comms disconnecting to give them privacy. " _Be careful, okay? Promise me._ "

"I promise," she whispered, forcing herself to say more, realizing it could very well be her last words to him. "You too, be careful I mean."

" _I will..."_ A few beats of silence followed but another explosion, one that bathed the room in orange light broke the moment of peace.  

_“You better be alive when I come get you. I still have to beat your high score.”_

Feelings she was too scared to name caught her throat and tears pricked at the corners of her eyes as she sniffled, "I know, idiot." His gentle laugh over the comms gave her brief respite, but as soon as his comm shut, she returned to her job with renewed fervor.

She rebooted the system and started from scratch, uploading a new prototype of a program that she hadn't had the opportunity to test. She'd exhausted her usual options and now she had no reason not to give it a shot. As the program filtered into the ship’s system, draining the purple lights and filling it with green, the door behind her blew open. Kosmo growled and stood in front of her protectively, but a lift of a hand and a blast of electrified energy was enough for the canine to be left on a collapsed heap by her feet.

"Kosmo!" her cry rang out, alarming Shiro who immediately shouted orders for her to leave through her comms.

" _Paladin of Voltron..."_ the hiss made her shiver. She quickly and discreetly tapped out the last of the commands before summoning her bayard to face the witch.

" _I've been sensing your presence more of late_ . _"_ A hand lifted and Katie found herself flung forward and into her grasp. She gasped as her helmet was pried off her head,  her lungs squeezing in her chest, crying for oxygen. She gulped for air desperately, tears streaming down her cheeks as Haggar's yellow eyes bore down on her squirming figure. No remorse nor sympathy in her gaze. She desperately summoned her bayard, only to feel it slip out of her fingers and clack uselessly onto the floor.

In midst of the fog that had settled in her brain, she heard a beep behind her and felt relief flood her bones, her body slacking willingly. The deed was done. It didn't matter if she died now.

The witch shrieked in disbelief, gripping her windpipe tight enough that she began to see black spots in her vision. Her sharp nails dug into her skin and Katie couldn't tell if it was blood or sweat that trickled down her neck.

" _No!"_

She thought about her parents, Matt and her friends and hoped beyond hope they outlive her _and_ the war.

“ _You will pay for this Paladin!_ ”

She never got to hear Lance’s answer. But at least she told him how she felt. Her shoulders tensed at that. She didn’t have regrets.

“ _Honerva! Release her this instant!”_

She felt a blow to her chest and her body fell to a heap. The loud ringing in her ears grew louder and she cried out as pain ravaged her midriff.  She saw a brief image of burnt skin and her suit in tatters and then her vision blacked. She heard Kosmo's snarl, Allura’s outraged cry and finally, the other paladins’ frenzied cries over her comms just as the world around her quietened.

* * *

 

Katie did not know where she was. Her body felt suspended, as though she was floating in space without a tether.

She ran the possibilities methodically through her head, trying to think of what happened last. Nothing came to her except for a loud, insistent static in her ears. It had no discernible pattern and her fingers instinctively twitched for her wrist computer, only to realize her body was frozen as well. All she saw was darkness and she wasn’t even sure if she _saw_ it or if her eyes were closed.

Sleep paralysis - perhaps it was that.  She attempted to wiggle her fingers and her toes; the trick usually worked like a charm, but this episode seemed particularly insistent. Sighing in defeat, she slumped - or would have, if she still had control over her body.

And then, the darkness ebbed away, and Katie squinted as light flooded her vision. When her eyes fluttered open, she found herself back on Medosia - her surroundings still looking every bit the ruins that Allura and herself had seen a few weeks ago.

"Like this?"

Katie glanced over and she felt herself smile at the bent-over figure of the little girl, "Good job, sweetheart." She saw the backs of her own, gloved hands reach over and help tinier hands bury the stones into the soil. The girl lifted her head and her breath hitched. Her small spacesuit made it difficult to discern the rest of her features, but Katie knew those distinctive honey eyes; she saw them every time she looked in a mirror.

"Are they seeds?"

"Something like that. We're giving it back it's natural energy sou-"

" _Pidge!_ "

" _Lance! Calm down!"_

" _I can't be fucking calm! She's losing too much blood!"_

"Mommy?"

She shook herself out her reverie and blinked at the child. The voices in her head were so _loud_. It was as though they were right next to her. She heard them so clearly - Lance and Shiro. She looked about her, trying in vain to find them.

"Time to leave, baby," she heard herself say. 

" _Pidge, don't you fucking dare die on me..."_

 

* * *

 

 

She was pale. Too pale for his liking.

The small freckles that doted her nose had almost faded to nothingness from the lack of sun. Her hand was cold and still in his, and he spent a good many hours warming them between his own. He remembered how much she hated feeling cold. It's been over a week since they'd found Katie's body - nearly mangled beyond repair if not for Altean technology - and the horrifying image of her unresponsive form being carried back by Shiro still gave him nightmares. She was healed now, her bones where they needed to be and her skin unblemished - save for the scars that had existed before. Every day, he made a wish to the stars to wake up to see her cheeks flush with health and her eyes open - filled with mischief and mirth as he always pictured her in his head.

"Lance, go take a shower."

He didn't turn to greet the voice behind him. Footsteps reached his side and a hand rested gently on his shoulder, wary of the bandages on his body.

"You should be in a healing pod."

"I don't really need it and...what if she wakes up alone, Ronnie? I need to stick by her side."

"She'll take one look at you, and would throw you out into the void for being dumb enough to not take care of yourself,” his sister deadpanned, indicating his state.

A weak smile found its way on his lips. "She really would." His thumb caressed over her knuckles and he sighed.

“I was supposed to introduce her to Mom.”

Veronica snorted at that. “Thinking of introducing her to Mom already? At least get her to go on a date with you first.”

He ran a thumb over her limp fingers, willing in his mind for them to curl back to life. “She’s heard so much about her from me she never got to meet her in-person.”

“And she _will_ meet her. Don’t you worry,” his sister sighed and squeezed his shoulder gently.

"Why isn't she awake yet? She was in the pod for so long."

"We're not exactly sure, Lance. Physiologically speaking, her body's healed. But she might struggle a little with breathing for a bit while her lungs recuperate. It's why her breaths are so shallow now."

Veronica walked over to one of the many monitors Pidge was hooked up to and looked over the charts. "Her brain waves are very active; she's very much alive. But her mind is still in shock. That's something the pods aren't equipped to fix. It’s probably because of the quintessence Haggar struck her with. We still don’t know the kind of effects it has on human biology. Or, I guess in this case, her psyche."

“She survived the other time!”

“The other time, she was exposed to a minute amount and well, there was no space witch trying to kill her. Again, Lance, we have _so_ much we don’t know.”

Lance’s shoulders slumped and tiny bit of dread in his chest quickly grew heavier. "What can I do?" his was voice strained, desperate. Veronica turned to him, her eyes softening.

"It’s a waiting game, Lance. Be strong for her," she made her way back to him and gently helped him up. "Most of all, look after yourself." She gestured to the pile of fresh clothes she'd left for him on the guest chairs behind him. "Go take a shower, please. I'll keep watch."

* * *

 

Her body felt heavy now, as though the weight of the universe was pressing her down. It wasn't as frightening as she expected it to be - her descent was stalled and gentle. Everything around her was warm - like she was back home, wrapped in her duvets and surrounded by her plush toys. Her left hand in particular, felt especially warm - as though someone was holding it.

She heard voices echo around her - some she recognized, others not as much. She strained her ears, hoping to hear Lance again. Occasionally, she heard a soft plea that sounds like him, but it's too muffled for her to make out.

It was beginning to frustrate her. Being idle was never her strong suit. She stuck out her hand and attempted to move her body; in any possible way as long as it was her own free will.

_“Sweetheart, I told you not to touch it! If you get lost, I don’t know if I can find you.”_

_“I’m sorry Mama.”_

She turned her head towards the voices, frowning at the familiarity in them. And then, a soft sobbing to her side.

_“Katie? Darling please, wake up.”_

This time, she recognized it immediately - it was her mother. She willed her limbs again to move but to no avail.

At times, the black void surrounding her would turn unbearably bright, and sounds that were familiar to her - the Atlas’ hum, soft snoring that was distinctively her father’s or just unfamiliar voices of people discussing brain waves, blood counts - and other things, but it would get too muffled for her to hear.

_“How is she?”_

_“Not much has changed from the last time. Her brain waves indicate that she’s dreaming though.”_

It was Keith and an unfamiliar voice, on either side of her. She tried to pry her lips apart to scream, hoping maybe to snap herself out - wherever the hell she was - and get their attention.

The blackness blanketed the bright light again and she sighed - or at least, she _thought_ she did. Her surroundings blurred and she found herself in her lab back on Earth. She knew it was her lab from the distinctive scribble of her handwriting on the boards but didn't recognize the new equipment, furniture or worse still, the little girl doodling on her lap. She saw the backs of her own hands tinkering with machine parts that looked entirely unfamiliar to her.

She heard herself sigh and the hands moved to carefully carry the child off her lap and onto her seat.

_“Wait here honey, I have to go get something from Uncle Hunk’s lab, okay?”_

The little girl, a little older this time than the first, nodded. Her head still bent over the tablet in her hands while Pidge (or she assumed, alternate universe Pidge, at least) walked out of her lab. The darkness followed and the scenes melted away.

And then, as though a switch had been flipped, her hand found purchase on long, familiar fingers. She gripped them tightly and gasped for air.

* * *

 

"...Pidge?" he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and sat up. His back ached, but it was the least of his worries. As soon he felt her fingers twitch in his, he jolted out of sleep.

Her eyes fluttered open and he let out a strangled gasp. " _Pidge!_ " His vision blurred with tears and he lifted her hand to press it over his chest.

"Lance..." her voice cracked.

"Oh, oh crap. I should go get-"

Her fingers gripped him harder, tugging him back and he stopped himself before he could go running.

"I'm...fine, dummy." her voice was weak but it had its classic snarky edge. Q _uiznack_ , how much he missed that. He sat back down next to her, gently helping her sit up against her pillows. Her eyes, still heavy with sleep, looked up to him. He felt her gaze on his bare, bandaged chest and arm as well as the dark purple bruise over his eye.

Her fingers loosened from his and she gingerly touched his cheekbone, a furrow forming between her brows at the sight of his mottled skin.

"I'm okay," he whispered, leaning his cheek into her small hand. Her pulse was strong against his skin and tension eased between his shoulders. After days of feeling near-nothing, the feeling of her heartbeat gave him relief like no other. He shifted his head to press his lips against her wrist, letting them linger over the gentle throb over the delicate skin.

Her cheeks flushed and he couldn't help the smile - his wish had come true. He let her jerk her hand back to herself and he stood up to fuss over her; fluffing her pillows, tucking the blankets around her and getting her a cup of water from the dispenser.

"Drink," he ordered, bringing the cup to her lips. Insisting that she finished the whole cup, Katie finally took feeble sips of the cool water. Within the first few sips, her hands cupped around his and she took more generous gulps. Once Lance pulled away, she sighed and wearily sat back against the pillows, looking about her in confusion.

"What happened?"

"A lot. But you just need to focus on res-"

" _Lance_."

Her fingers gently squeezed his; a plea for him not to coddle her. Her tone isn't as shrill as it would have been, but the annoyance conveyed was clear. His shoulders slumped as he gave in to her - far too shaken with relief that he hadn't lost her.

"Long story short, the Robeasts are destroyed, Allura closed off the rift and sealed Hagg-"

"Wait, the rift opened again?"

"Well, Haggar- Honerva- whoever- opened it, somehow. Like Allura predicted, she got greedy for the quintessence and it basically ate her alive. And well, you managed to hack into the control panels of her ship and overrode the commands to the Komars to make them self-destruct. That a was a _huge_ help."

"I know what I did," she interjected, shifting in her bed and wincing as her muscles ached from lack of use. "But what about the rest? Where are they?"

"We lost a few people," he began, bringing his bandaged arm forward so he could hold her hand in both of his. “The MFEs took the brunt of Komars’ shots for us.”

He watched her eyes widen in fear. “James? Is he okay? I-I mean all the MFEs of course,” she flushed, sitting up against the headboard.

Lance ignored the little stab in his chest. “He’s fine. A little worse for wear, but kickin’. His ward is only a few doors down. Rizavi’s critically injured but she’s stable. So is Leif. Kinkade _had_ a few broken bones but quiznack, that man is built like a tree. I saw him in the training deck the other day.”

“And the rest? Hunk, Keith, Allura?”

Lance chuckled. “They’re all _fine_ Pidge. We were way more worried about you.”

“So they’re okay?” she pressed insistently.

"Yellow took a few hits for me so Hunk was hurt but he’s alright now. Allura...she's healing. At least, I hope she is."

He stood up and pushed down on her shoulders before she could jump out of bed. "She's _safe_ and not even on the ship. Her fight with Haggar drained her. Coran said she needs time to recuperate in pure quintessence, so Keith and him took her to...um, that glowy place?"

"Oriande?"

"Yeah! There! The Colony Alteans are with them too. Quiznack, there’s so much that happened in a week I can’t imagine just waking up to all this," he shook his head, squeezing her hand gently.

She slumped back against her bed and sighed. "Matt? My parents?"

"Your parents are with Shiro, they're working with Coalition for plans on peace treaties and rehabilitation programs for the Alteans. Most of the population’s in a state of shock and all. Having a change of management more than once can get a little jarring I guess.”

He reached forward and combed through her messy locks absentmindedly, smiling as she leaned into his hand as it came to rest on her cheek.

“And Matt's more than okay. When he found out you were unconscious, he got to the Atlas as soon as the Rebels let him. If it wasn't me sitting here, it's him."

"He's here?" her voice was so hopeful and relieved, it hurt him to deflate her.

"No, he had to go back to help with relief missions. He said he’d be back soon, though."

An adorable pout formed at that, her eyes reverting down to her hands. "So everyone's hard at work and I've just been...sleeping here? Doing nothing?"

" _Katie_ ," his firm tone had her looking up at him with wide eyes; right on cue, the heart monitors elevated. "You practically took down a dozen Komars on your own and had a space witch nearly drain the life out of you. You did more than enough."

"But-"

"But nothing, you earned your rest." The finality of his voice made her seal her lips and he smiled indulgently at the small, rare win.

A silence fell over them and he was grateful to note; a comfortable, pensive one. Whatever awkwardness they'd held before was finally gone now.

"So...it's all over?"

The heart monitor slowed and Lance glanced over to it with a flush rising up his neck.

"For the most part, yeah."

Another silence and Lance found himself tracing over the faded scars on her hand. They didn’t quite look like battle scars - moreso from little accidents in a lab.

“What about...us?” she asked softly.

His heart at his throat, he lifted his gaze to her eyes. “What _about_ us?”

“Are we...okay too?”

Lance had to pause at that, startled at the fact that he hadn’t seen the question coming. He hadn't questioned what they were in a while, all his thoughts had revolved around her well-being.

“I want us to be” He felt her hand over his and he easily twined his fingers through hers. “We will be,” he promised, more sure of it. “Do you remember our deal?”

“I’m a little tired for video games Lance, but I’d love to-”

“Not _that_ , Pidge.”

His brows raised pointedly at her, a ghost of a smirk quirking to his lips. Her lips parted and her cheeks flushed pink again. Right on cue, the heart monitors betrayed her with their incessant beeps. But the smirk quickly disappeared once her hand slipped away from his to run through her messy, short locks.

“I don’t recall,” she laughed lightly, fully knowing that Lance could see through her lie. She sat up straighter on her bed and looked at him from the corner of her eye. “Do you mind if I check in on James?”

“I do mind, actually,” he breathed, matching her body language but puffing his chest in mild annoyance. He pulled himself onto her bed, trapping her body - but careful not to lean his weight on her -  with his forearms and Pidge looked up to him with wide eyes, her entire face red was now at his sudden boldness. “I’ve been waiting _months_ to tell a girl how I feel. I’m not going to miss my chance. Not for the third time.”

“ _Third_?! What were the first two?”

“On the Garrison rooftop and when you were discharged from quarantine,” he answered, shifting himself so his body trapped Pidge to her bed. “Technically, I tried to many times in between and after, but you're gone like the wind before I can even start.” There was no way he was having her run away again. He watched with mild amusement as she squirmed beneath him.

“I-I’m not ready-”

“You’re going to have to make yourself ready _hermosa_ ,” the corner of his lip quirking up in a smirk. “I think nearly everyone - even my _mom_ \- knew before you do.”

“What does she know?” she asked nervously, shifting herself back against the headboard in a feeble attempt to put distance between them. Her hands came up to rest on his bare shoulders and she weakly attempted to push him away.

“Now you’re curious?” he teased, leaning his face closer to hers, earning a squeak from her.

“Ahem.”

Lance paled and turned his head to see Matt Holt standing by the door. His arms were crossed and he looked far too calm for his liking.

“Lance?”

He gulped, shakily pushing his torso up and off of Pidge who, at this point, had thrown her bedsheets over her head. “Yeah?”

“Did you know that I have diplomatic immunity in at least thirty different sectors of the universe?”

“ _Matt_ ,” Pidge groaned.  “You have the worst timing.”

She peeked over her sheets to see her brother shaking his head, her eyes lighting up despite her embarrassed state.“I can _leave_ ,” her brother sighed, placing his hands on his hips as he frowned at Lance’s hands on her waist. He was quick to pull them away. Matt looked relieved nonetheless to see his sister awake and well. “Jeez, Pidge. I would have thought you’d be happy to see me.”

“I’ll leave,” Lance stood immediately, giving her a playfully stern look. “But I’m not done with you.”

“Still _right here,_ man.”

* * *

 

“Heard she’s awake,” Hunk dropped casually as Lance helped him sit up. He ignored the prodding tone of his friend’s voice and the unspoken question that lingered in the silence.

“Well?” he poked his arm.

“No, not yet,” he sighed, answering his unasked question. The yellow paladin groaned and looked at him wearily.

“Quiznack, I was fully expecting you two to confess _before_ we go into a war. Now, the war’s over and you _still_ haven’t told her?”

“What’s the rush? We’re all stuck in this big ship for a while before we return to Earth.”

“What’s the rush? _What’s the rush_ ?!” Hunk stopped himself before he could blow his top on him. He took a few calming breaths and covered his face. “Do you have _any_ idea how long I’ve been watching you two tiptoe around each other?”

“A while...I guess,” Lance laughed nervously.

“ _Years_ , Lance. Years.”

A voice spoke up behind them. “Oh, that’s interesting. Well, I guess it’s fair game now for me to ask her out again?” James leaned against the door, classic smug expression present.

“Y’know what? I fully endorse you James. You have my blessing.” Hunk looked pointedly at Lance who only rolled his eyes.

“There’s a small viewing deck towards the top of the ship, where the generators are” James began. “It’s for the maintenance crew’s access, but no one’s there during the night cycle. It has a great view of the galaxies. Almost like you’re stargazing back on Earth.”

“Might be a good place for a date,” Hunk waggled his eyebrows.

He turned to James who just shrugged. “It’s something she’d like, I think.”

“She would,” Lance smiled finally, giving him a grateful smile. “Thanks James.”

* * *

 

“Are we even allowed back here?”

He watched Pidge look about her worriedly, clearly not understanding for the life of her why he was taking her through the maintenance shafts. The night cycle had started several hours ago and the ship was mostly quiet. The hum of the Atlas’ engines and their scuffled footsteps are the only sounds that reverberated through the small tunnels.

“Technically? No. But who’s going to stop the universe’s greatest defenders?”

She rolled her eyes at him and tucked her hands into her lab pockets. “Can you at least tell me where we’re going?”

“You’ll see,” he replied cheerily, pausing his stride for a moment so she could catch up to him. She was still dressed in her lab attire - complete with dirt streaked lab coat. He’d dropped by her lab, five minutes ahead of their agreed meeting time because he _knew_ that she would get lost in her experiments. There, he took one look at her get-up, her scrunched up nose as she squinted at some workings and her short, messy ponytail and fell in love all over again. Even when she’d insisted on changing her clothes, he simply took her hand and dragged her out of the labs.

“What were you doing with all that dirt in your lab anyway?”

She flushed at his question, and scratched her cheek with a faraway look in her eyes. “A...dream inspired me to try and recreate the conditions on Medosia in the labs. I buried the rocks into the soil and the residual quintessence in them sort of... _activated_ them.”

“Activated how?”

“Well, for one, when I tried to harness its energy to charge my phone, it exploded,” she smiled sardonically to herself. “I probably shouldn’t have done that, in hindsight, but it was fun.”

“You scare me sometimes, Pidge,” he laughed, quietly grateful that they could be their carefree selves again. “But really, does it mean it’s a power source like quintessence?”

“My theory? It’s the raw form of power. It’s probably the state of what quintessence was _before_ it becomes quintessence. It goes beyond human-derived physics but it makes sense. Whoever was planting the rocks was  probably trying to revive the planet and that’s probably the best way to do it. Otherwise, Allura would exhaust herself each time she brought a planet back to life.”

Her steps quickened with her excitement of her project and Lance had to admit it was infectious. She was soon matching him in stride, keeping up with his long legs despite her short stature as she continued. “We’re looking at the best possible energy source to power trans-reality travelators.”

Lance took a moment to digest the new term. “Like a time travel machine?”

She shook her head quickly. “No, time travel is _impossible_ Lance. Einstein himself said that.”

“No, based on his _theories_ , it’s impossible. But hey, the past few years we found a magical alien princess, flying robot lions with minds of their own and a cosmic space witch that tried to travel between realities. I don’t think Einstein would have been so sure of himself if he’d been alive to see those.”

She gaped at him again and he merely shrugged. “All your technical talk made me feel like I had to read up to keep up with you.” She looked touched for a moment and he waved his hand to rid of the sentiment, feeling less than casanova cool at the moment.

“And the dreams you’ve been having? They still there?”

“Yeah, I still get them,” she sighed. “Not nearly as nightmarish as before, but I wish I could talk to Allura about it.”

“She’ll be back soon,” he said assuredly, squeezing her fingers as she pouted. “Keith said she was making good progress in recovery.”

“Why can’t we visit her again?”

“Even if we wanted to, they don’t think it’s best if humans go into a range that’s just pure quintessence. But besides that, there’s plenty of work to do. Hunk’s already roped in for some diplomacy missions, you’re tied up with the research team and I’ve been asked to tag along the with MFEs on relief missions once they’ve recovered.”

“Why didn’t you go with Hunk for the time being?”

His lips parted for a bit as he considered his answer carefully. “I wanted to be with you,” he answered honestly. The slight quiver of her fingers in his told him she knew what was coming and he was glad that this time, he didn’t have to pin her down to a bed to have her listen to him. Since _that_ day, in her ward, Pidge hadn’t been able to look him in the eye without turning red as beets and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t ruminate on how good she felt pressed underneath him.

“I didn’t mean to...pin you down like that the other time,” he began, a flush rising up his neck. “Well, I _did_ mean to. But only because you looked ready to bolt and I was not gonna let you go again,” he led her down a flight of stairs into a cavernous maintenance tunnel. I’m a _complete_ gentleman otherwise, I swear.”

“It’s okay,” she whispered, squeezing her small fingers around his. “I’m kind of glad you did. I really was about to run...like a coward.”

He felt a corner of his lips quirk upward“Would have been a good payback for me running out on you though.” And his heart soared as she smiled shyly in return.

“How’s the time machine going?”

“Again, it’s _not_ a time machine, Lance,” she laughed lightly. “It’s a _trans-reality travelator_ . The prototype doesn’t work yet. I tried putting an apple through the portal, but it burnt to crisp. Tried again with a pea and that just disappeared to Bob knows where. So I guess I just have to reconfigure it to handle larger, inanimate objects and hopefully, _living_ beings... one day. Maybe when I’m ninety.”

He stopped walking to turn towards her. She looked a little deflated but as soon as his fingers tilted her chin up towards him and he gave her a soft, adoring kiss to her forehead, her features lit up. “I'm sure this is just a small roadblock for the brilliant Katie Holt,” he soothed, knowing that she would be back up and running within the next week; blazing new trails and blowing his and many others’ minds.

“Have I ever told you... how much I love hearing you call me by my name?” Her voice was so soft and shy - uncharacteristic for her but not at all unwelcome. Much like the new, breathless intimacy between them, it melted his heart.

“Yeah? Then I’ll do it more often,” he promised, rubbing his thumb over the flush on her cheeks, the color deepening with his promise.

“W-what’s taking so long,” she stammered, swatting his hands away. “We’ve been walking for ages.”

“We’re already here! Just up this ladder,” he placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her in the right direction. Pidge turned to raise her brow at him and he only gave her a bright smile. She sighed and stepped forward, slowly climbing up the metal rungs. He held his breath as soon as her head poked over the top.

She was silent for several seconds, and he watched her jaw drop. She slowly shook her head and turned back to him in disbelief. “I...feel under-dressed,” she looked about her and then down to him. He was wearing his paladin uniform as she was, but her eyes reverted to his hair where he’d combed it over neatly. “It’s like some kind of fancy place for dates. If I’d known I would have thrown on a dress or something.”

Pidge in a dress. He’d love that. But he liked her as she was.

“I told you to come as you are, and you are dressed as I always picture you,” he said, climbing after her and noting her confused expression only when he reached the top. “What?”

“You picture me dirty all the time?”

The tips of his ears warmed and he cleared his throat nervously. She hadn’t meant it in _that_ way, he was sure, but the unintentional innuendo didn’t go over his head. “ _No_ , I picture you in a lab coat.” That didn’t help much either and he was just glad that Pidge appeared oblivious to his real thoughts.

She eventually crawled further into the small, loft-like alcove, her eyes going from the large skyline window that offered breathtaking views of the stars, distant galaxies and nebulas, to the carefully arranged picnic set-up. The ceilings were too low for him, but perfect for her stature.

He crawled towards her, nudging her to the small pillows he’d arranged on the blanket. There, he had some of the food Hunk and himself had prepared (mostly Hunk as he’d kicked him out of the kitchen halfway) and because they can, two glasses of the finest _synthethol_ he’d managed to smuggle with the help of the Atlas’ bartender.

“The bartender said you’d like this,” he shrugged, handing her a flute filled with a drink that changed from red to yellow in gradient. Katie blinked at the glass offered to her. “I’m not twenty-one yet,” she laughed, accepting it all the same. “And I don’t really like alcohol all that much.”

“We’re out in _space_ Pidge,” he chuckled. “And you know what, the bartender said that she mixed it especially for you,”

She raised an eyebrow at that but took a tentative sip, her brows raising as she looked down at the drink. “It’s actually not that bad.”

He helped her settle back against the pillows, before settling in next to her. He took a generous gulp of his own drink to steady his nerves, taking a moment to let the comfortable silence settle between them - tension gone.

“Katie…” her breath hitched and he felt something in him stir. He took in deep breath before continuing.  “If I hadn't met you...I don't know who I'd be.”

“You’d be loverboy Lance,” she smiled at him over the rim of her glass, clearly making his life more difficult. “Annoying and nosy as you always were, hitting on any and every girl in your sights…”

“Hey! I didn’t hit on _you_!”

“And I was the only one that secretly liked you,” she giggled. “When you’re not being a loverboy, you’re actually sweet and...thoughtful. I liked that about you.”

He took a moment to immortalize the image before him in his memories. How beautiful she was in the dim light of the cosmos above them; honey eyes glinting with mischief and affection. It was only when her cheeks turned red and she self consciously tucked a lock of hair behind her ear did he realize that he was staring at her mutely.

“I- I mean, you going after your family - it started all of this,” he gulped, suddenly feeling like he was ten years old again and telling a middle-school crush that he liked her. “I was just lucky I was put in the same team as you - and that I was nosy enough to follow after you.”

“Hey, Blue chose you.” She bit her lower lip to disguise a smile and Lance, once again, felt his mind wander to places a true gentleman should be ashamed of. Her lips were moist with the sweet synthethol and the tip of her pink tongue darted out to lick her lips. He forced himself to lift his eyes and he realized then that her half-lidded gaze rested heavily on him. He gulped again.

“Can I just…” she crawled slowly towards him and he stilled, feeling his cheeks burn. But as soon as she reached his front, she reached up and tousled his neatly combed hair a wide smile on her face that reached her eyes.

“Hey!”

“There you go, _now_ you look like Lance.”

He looked at her blankly and then burst into laughter, putting his hands on her hips and pulling her to his lap. She’s small enough that she fit comfortably between his legs, her hands braced on his shoulders.

“Caterina Holt, I’m so in love with you,” he breathed, feeling his shoulder lighten with the admission and his heart swelling to see how her gaze softened for him. Tears welled up in her eyes and she quickly pulled her gaze away, unable to meet his own intense one. His hands slid up her hips to bring them up to her cheeks. “You don’t believe me?” he asked gently.

“I do!” she breathed. “I just...I’m just scared,” she sighed, leaning her cheek against one of his hands. Lance leaned forward, smiling to himself as he heard her breath hitch. His lips settled on her cheek, just ghosting over the corner of her lips. He pulled her closer and her hands slid down to his chest. Her fingers fumbled with the slew of new badges pinned neatly on his uniform as she always did when she was nervous.

He sighed and nuzzled the side of her head, letting her ensconce herself against his chest.

“Of what?” he prodded, lips pressed to her hair.

“Of...getting hurt. Or hurting _you_. Or breaking up and never being your friend again or-”

“Katie.”

It’s his firm voice again and she quietened, looking up to him meekly that was far too adorable for his liking. He knew, just _knew_ that very pout and those eyes were going to be his kryptonite. “I can’t predict the future, but I have a hunch that...we’re going to be just fine.”

“We can forecast it,” she mumbled lamely, “within a reasonable margin of error.” With a softer voice and her eyes averted away, she whispered “I don’t know what the odds are of us….making it.” The light quiver in her voice - the rare moment of vulnerability that she’d allowed herself to express  – sent shivers down his spine.

Lance felt himself still for a moment as he took in her words. He leaned forward and nudged his nose along the curve of her cheekbone until she yielded to his nuzzles. His thumb brushed soothing circles against her jawline as he kept his gaze on her, willing her to look back at him and only continuing when she did. He leaned forward, eyes asking for silent permission. She gave her reply by closing the distance.

Her lips were as sweet as he’d always imagined them to be. Bitten with her nervous habits but so soft and pliable under his heated kisses. His heartbeats were near non-existent - almost as though time had stopped and the only things that moved in the cosmos around them were her small hands clutching his shirt and his own pulling the elastic off her ponytail to run through her short locks. She surprised him with coy nibbles but a dart of her tongue over his. Blood rushed to his ears and other regions he did not want to think about, not when she was nestled on his lap.

She pulled away from him first, and from the redness across her cheeks and her heavy breathing, he gathered she had forgotten to breathe. He shoved more licentious thoughts back as her soft pants filled the room.  “Never tell me the odds,” he began, feeling his heart soar as a shy smile bloomed on her face in recognition of the reference. “Because, if I wanted to take my chances,” he kissed the tip of her nose, “I know it’ll be with you.”

Before he could ask her if she was alright, she was kissing him again, with an intensity that had him leaning back against the pillows, letting her hands go up to his shoulders so she could pull her small frame closer to him.

“Quiznack, I can’t believe I’m in love with a nerd,” she murmured, burying her face to his chest.

“You and me both.”  His head dove again; this time for kisses not as innocent but no less tender.

And when she finally whispered _“I love you, Lance Serrano,”_ against his lips,  he knew, for once in his life with relative certainty, that they were going to be more than just fine.

* * *

 

 

_Epilogue_

 

Lance leaned a forearm on the glass, looking into the window of the lab. A few interns to the side giggled and nudged one another. It had to be a daily spectacle to them. The subject of his attentions was still unaware; a hand supported her small, but prominent belly as she descended the steps to the lab whilst speaking animatedly with a fellow researcher. Lance felt his features soften as she smiled towards her colleague, her hand languidly ghosting across the circumference of her belly.

Lunchtime was something Lance looked forward to fervently. It was the one time in the long hours they worked that he could meet his wife. But more than that, it reminded him of the normalcy he was blessed with after the years of homesickness, war and the savagery that’d come with it that he’d both participated in and bore witness to. A few years ago, he would have given anything to have the life he had today and he was more than glad that the cosmos looked kindly upon them enough to grant their wish.

Eventually, the giggles of the interns caught her attention and Katie turned around to see the devoted gaze of her husband through the glass. The corners of her lips lifted and she turned to her colleague, giving him a brief apology before leaving the lab. He was already there, holding the door open for her.

“What will it be today, Dr Holt?”

“Sushi.”

His brow raised. She knew better than to give him no option but to say no to her. But she giggled and took his arm as soon as they were away from prying eyes.

“I’m kidding! I hate to say this, but I’d _kill_ for an empanada.”

“I _knew_ the Cuban genes would override!” Lance threaded his fingers through his wife’s, lifting her hand so he could press a kiss to her knuckles.

“Just don’t let my nonna hear you,” she sighed, rolling her eyes but an affectionate smile present.

“Any breakthroughs today?” he queried, helping her into their car.

“So much!” her eyes lit up in the way he loved so much. Only she could make him listen tirelessly to a lecture on metaphysics...which was exactly what she was doing now. As much she’d try to simplify it for him, the more technical aspects of it still went over his head. But he knew enough to know that their first rounds of experiments were already doing well.

“...We’re looking at approving volunteer trials within the next year. We already have so many people who’ve signed up.”

“That’s _amazing_ , Pidge,” he gushed sincerely, reaching for her hand. Lance squeezed it gently in his as they waited at a red light, playing with her fingers absentmindedly as she leaned forward to press a casual kiss to his cheek.

“You’re my muse; if scientists can have one,” she said, laughing at his blush.

“I bet you’d never thought your idiot husband of all people would predict that you accidentally invented a time machine.”

“You got lucky! And _again_ not a time machine. Not yet, at least.”

“Still hearing time machine, babe. Just admit it, I was right and Einstein was wrong.” He dodged her swat with a laugh.

Crowds filled the streets with the lunch hour as they drove into the heart of the city. Around them, people and aliens milled about; hailing from all walks of life and far reaches of the universe. An imposing statue of Voltron, twin blades gleaming prominently, went past them as he took a turn into a street lined with alien shops from the Lapilis sector. To think that a decade ago, the image before him would have been nothing but a plot out of a science fiction movie.

At a red light, Lance’s gaze rested on a couple - one alien, the other human - holding either hands of their mixed child as they crossed the road before them. The little girl laughed excitedly, purple pigtails bouncing as she made a mad dash across the pedestrian crossing. Her frazzled parents ran after her in a hurry, begging her to be careful. He couldn’t help but smile.

“When’s the next ultrasound appointment?”

“Next week,” Pidge replied, looking distractedly out the window.

“I can’t wait to see her again,” he murmured softly, smiling indulgently to himself.

His wife turned to him with a raised, amused eyebrow. “Her? How are you so sure the baby's a girl already?”

“A hunch,” he winked, earning a punch to the shoulder. “Have you thought about names? I remember you said you wanted something that’s a little Spanish and Italian,” he continued.

She hummed in thought as a hand brushed tenderly over her belly.

“I’ve always like Marzia for a girl.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all enjoyed this story! ♥ Do let me know your thoughts~


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